leather and stilettos
by Ayanemoon
Summary: A romantic comedy about what happens when you hear so many stories about one person for so many years, and when you actually get to meet her, well, let's just say that things don't get too easy. Characters: Bucky Barnes x Original character,( Reader) Steve Rogers, Others along the way. Warnings: Language, general gross cuteness, some angst, ... ENGLISH IS MY 3rd LANGUAGE! no Beta.
1. finally meeting

"Dear diary,

I met him today, AT MY APARTMENT…I know! Right!  
So He was wearing something different from his usual color palette, the usual Black leather, and heavy riders boots, to a casual white top tank and some light gray jeans , even some beat up Vans with the deepest red which appeared to be Steve's?.  
His hair done in a cute man bun, but nothing can be said about his rebellious long bangs that pretty much where screaming their love for his face. Did I mention the fucking beard?...well. Kill me please!

He was Waiting for Steve to come home while cleaning his aviator's patiently on my couch like he owned the fucking block, and His metal prosthetic was glimmering with every movement of his arms.  
I was dying to see him again, and then, He is here! ... Steve did not come home early today, which was not unusual really, he runs for hours .I've known Steve for like four years now, every day is a blessing with that boy, until That day , Steve's graduation party last September when a guy came to the party dressed like a fucking Rock star, Rocking in leather and long hair, playing with the chains of his dog tags ...I didn't know that it was him at that time, But everything was screaming 'Danger'.And that was It. That's when I felt alive for the first time..."

I paused for a bit, tapping the pen on the paper absent-mindedly thinking about that night .And what a night it was!

I was with the group from my college days ,having a very good time. when I saw Steve's eyes widen like I've only seen him do when the pizza guy knocked on the door after a long run at the library. Being that much unusual, I couldn't figure out why? I mean, the pizza guy was here like an hour ago!  
Curious, I turned my head in the direction where Steve was looking and let's just say that Days were much simpler before that moment.

A God! A fucking Dark God just came into a mortals place...was he lost or something?... I completely forgot about what I was doing in that place... If it wasn't for the loud music which was pretty much a white noise in the background of my head at the moment, replaced by the drumes of my own heartbeat. And then That Creature did the second most beautiful thing That I've seen that week...He Just...Smiled!... A wild, most sincere, most breathtaking gleam of pure Joy.  
And, Steve ran, he ran to the guy, who was beaming at him with open arms. when the final contact happened, and the arms were locked on each other in a crushing hug, I could swear to this day that I felt the amplitude of what was between those two.

The guy's left "metallic?" hand gripped the back of Steve's neck while the right one locked on his back. I Could see his face being buried in Steve's shoulders while my friend kept "cradling"him!?.OK! so it must be someone close, like Really close. But Steve never had a family after his Ma died. Apart from...Wait! No! Really? Him? Is that Bucky? Like for real? Steve told me about his childhood best friend, the only One who was with him from the Kindergarten through high school.T he only person that could put the sparkles in his eyes when he was talking about the him, the guy never shut up about him, Bucky was like a ghost always roaming around for the past years I've known Stevie, it was nice to finally see him in person.

I got on my feet, passing a hand through my clothes, arranging my favorite "Scorpions" T-shirt that I threw out with some skinny dark Blue jeans and The FIRST most beautiful thing that I saw that week... A black leather stiletto that matches my own leather jacket. then I noticed that Steve's is coming back WITH that god on his hands.

"Guys! Guys.. Look who's here!" Steve shouted excitedly while grabbing the other man's boob?ok  
"Hey! Buck! holy shit man, that's a fucking surprise..." said Clint after Throwing Himself on the poor guy. Bucky greeted everyone with a nod and smiled to Nat.  
" How did you know where we were?" asked Steve after a moment, trying to be seated properly with the new arrival added to that small, very unsuited-for-having-so-many people-on couch!  
Steve was still smiling to his back teeth showing, which was really good to watch, as I seated myself on the armchair next to Natasha on Steve's left crossing my legs.

"It's Nat, she texted me A while ago"I finally had the first taste of his voice... that, I wished I never did!  
Steve looked at Nat with the sweetest face ever.  
I know that Natasha knew the duo in high I guessed that they stayed in touch.

"congratulations Stevie..." Bucky added turning his gaze to Steve and smiling like a big brother that he actually was.

Steve was floating right now with happiness which was drawn on his smile, it was clear which one of us had the best gift for our dear boy.  
Thanks, Nat!you sneaky little...I thought while grabbing my drink and smiling fondly. people gifts objects, things, not a person!

And it was then when Bucky decided to keep talking  
"Can anyone of you do the introductions?" he looked at me with a sneaky smile which at that point just added gasoline to the whole war that was raging in me

I looked right into those light blue, No gray...! Fucking Grey eyes! WTF dude! come on ...not fair!  
"Right," cut Steve, "this is Moon, she was my college roommate, still is actually. roommate, that is !... Well, I told you about her Buck, This is she." said Steve still smiling like a kid " This is Buck. Moon, the one and only."  
"Hey doll!" said Bucky piercing me with his Fucking eyes  
I was RED...Nat looked at me fighting her sneaky smile.  
"Hi!" that was the only thing that I could manage at the moment. which was, let's be honest HUGeeee!  
I closed my fingers around my empty glass, as they kept talking….What the hell is wrong with me?

This is typically ME, every time, every fucking time, I find someone attractive, I become this…Stupid little girl blushing at everything. like a freaking teenager all over again. But Ifhe was attractive AND I don't see him as a potential Boyfriend, nothing changes. Am Me, with every sarcastic, unladylike side of me, I show everything and don't give monkey's ass about his reaction… But this is James fucking Barnes… !

Why can't I be cute, and talkative? Show off all my good and feminine sides. I know I can be quite boyish, well all my friends find that sweet and charming in its way. But why do I lose all my potentials as soon as am interested in someone?!

Bucky, was still looking at me now and throughout the evening, which made me SOo Alert to his presence at the party, well How could he Not be Noticeable! like, come on! That dude was like a freaking eye magnet, and I thanked God for that at some point, because it gave me reassurance that I was not the only one doing so..so yeah kept looking.

I was in the kitchen at after a while, helping Nat and Wanda clearing out some mess at the twin's apartment, they were nice enough to let the party happen there, so let's be civil about it. when Bucky made his way to sit on the kitchen counter across from me, trying to keep myself busy to avoid making a fool of myself, deciding to clear out the small table next to the couch which was covered with plastic cups and empty pizza boxes. Walking to it, I could feel those sinful eyes on me, when I got back, he brought his glass to his lips and purred.

"nice shoes!" with a side smile.

Ok! so he noticed that gorgeous little piece of happiness I was wearing...OK! thanks, anybody shoots me now...cause it is going to hurt if this continues!  
"hum...Thanks!" I replied blushing. "you like them?" I tried to be casual while sustaining his gaze  
"How could I not?! I mean look at them…" he said widening his eyes " But it's not the shoes that drew my attention first though!" he took a sip

"ho! what then?"Surprised really like what is there to like apart from the shoes!

He moved forward and took the tip of my shirt between his Index and thumb  
I could cook a fucking omelet on My cheek right now.

"I like the shirt!...didn't think that anyone could pull off a rock band shirt with High heeled stilettos," He said while FUCKING licking his lips which were red after so many rounds between his teeth.

"Scorpions heuh!" he added with a smirk" would have taken you for a 1D girl"

"Really!"I stopped mid-work stunned and looked at him; Wtf dude 1D? really do I look like am twelve?  
He didn't reply, just kept side smiling, and turned to Steve, the fucker he was sooo playing with me now!

the night got to an end, and I and Buck didn't get to talk after the 1D thing, but it was Ok, some side glances now and then were enough.

Cause in a million years I wasn't prepared for what was coming.


	2. when the heavens speaks

Two days, Two whole days before my life was turned upside down, a knock on the door woke me from my Saturday morning sleep… Steve, that fucker must have forgotten his keys again when he went for his morning Run. so I got on my feet stumbling on everything on the floor, like a drunken child, In my short shorts and Gun's N Roses T-shirt, My hair was not to be mentioned at the moment!

"What the hell steve, you know that I wasn't planning on waking up at all today…the hell are your keys for!"I whined while opening the door.

"Hey there little scorpion! "Said the ONLY person on earth WHICH I DID NOT wish to see ME like this when I woke up.

"hum, ah, what! You?...Whaaat!" well, let's say that I am completely awake now.

"you look cute!" he commented as he entered the living room, practically throwing himself on the couch.

OK! So he likes rock band shirts .yeah I get that! And he thinks am cute?!

"make yourself at home…"I added looking at him incredulously while crossing my arms to hide my trembling fingers

"Thanks, I will" he smiled looking at me with those eyes, promising troubles six ways 'til Sunday

I pretty much sprinted to my room after that. James FUCKING Barnes was on my couch! Scrubbing his aviators!

Did I have a guardian angel somewhere which I didn't know about? Get it together girl…

So first things first, I had to change ASAP. But he liked the shirt! Ok so leave the shirt, throw on some pants idiot! Five minutes later I was stepping out of my bedroom, with some jeans, and the only pair of flat shoes that I had, always heels!

I've always had great chocolate long hair but needed some brushing in the morning.

I calmed myself enough to open the door and just walked out!

When Bucky saw me heading out to the kitchen, he came to sit on the counter chair studying me from head to toe.

"heu…" he paused looking at my jeans " shame, I liked the shorts better!" he pouted.

HE fucking pouted like a freaking five years old…

didn't comment, just smiled politely…Blushing fifty shades of red while trying to get a hold on my sarcastic side soo hard at the moment. Oh, keep doing that, Buddy…Am coming along.

I felt myself getting back to the real me by the second I spent with the dude. And I liked it.

yes! of course Buck was attractive and wildly charming, and Yes! I had a thing for his long hair since I saw him! Well Not only him, I've always had a thing for long hair guys…But Bucky's were like melting chocolate, Just wanted one quick slid off my fingers through those auburn locks.

and I practically couldn't speak the last time I saw the guy. But the more I spent time with the guy, the more I got used to him so I could be myself, Which meant, Finally some common sense

I took out my cereal bowl and a coffee cup, from the kitchen cabinet, Bucky kept looking at me while I did so. So I asked if he wanted something like a polite person would do.

"No thanks, I had a hot dog on my way up here, You know It's noon right!" Bucky said.

but it didn't stop him from reaching to the spoon and helping himself from my breakfast.

"ok cool! "I shrugged sitting on the chair opposite to him. "what are you doing?"

"nothing," he peered at me from the corner of his eyes "just eating some girl's breakfast at 1 in the afternoon" he replied sarcastically while eating MY cereal with MY spoon after He just said That he Just had a hot dog.

"I mean, What are you doing here? As In My apartment!"I corrected as I took back my bowl of cereals.

"right, yeah, Steve told me to come today so here I am" he replied smiling and shrugging his eyebrows and finish chewing his bit.

And right on cue, Steve came in through the door.

"Hey, Moon! Did Buc…Bucky, you're here!" Steve pretty much Radiated with Joy as he approached us

"hey Buddy!" bucky smiled back

"Thanks for the heads up Steve, "I said

"Am sorry, I really meant to do it, I spoke with him yesterday on the phone, and after he hung up, I tried to tell you so I went to your room but you were already sleeping." Explained Steve

"tell me about what?"I asked and took a spoon of cereal in my mouth

" You didn't tell her ?"he said

"tell me what?" I asked

"Stevie here," started Bucky "...asked me if I wanted to move in with you two!"…he paused to see my reaction, which was the complete and utter opposite of Steve's right now.

I didn't respond, how could I !, I mean, I was literally Stun, with steve's hopeful smile and that demon's piercing eyes. Noticing my face, Bucky turned to look at his best friend, surprised?

" I Can't Believe it, Steve, You didn't ASK her first?" he said suddenly

And, ok I wasn't expecting this.

"I know, I'm sorry, I should have discussed it with you before asking him But, It just that we were talking about how he couldn't find the right place to settle in, and the next thing I was asking him to move in with me! I mean with US!" explained Steve clearly uncomfortable .

"steeeve!" Bucky exhaled. Flattening his palm on the counter, and looking at them

"am sorry! But I didn't think; Moon You know how I am when it comes to him!" steve added honestly

And the thing is I really knew! Sadly, and honestly, that was what I loved about that blonde boy, his warm and huge heart and his devotion to his best friends.

"I know, Buddy, and I get it, I would have done the same, to be honest!"I smiled why taking steve's hand, "But I just wished you could have told me as soon as you could! I mean, wish I didn't end up greeting the man dressed in shorts." I joked to lighten the mood.

"The man liked those shorts!" Bucky commented as soon as I finished. While holding up his finger.

" I bet you did!" steve and I said at the same time. Then we both started laughing…

Bucky's sinful, NOT-Fair grey eyes were locked on me, what did he expect? That I would say No?

I stood up to clean my bowl at the sink, steve is having a bottle of iced tea from the fridge, and Bucky just sat there watching us, thinking apparently.

"are you really Ok with this, Moon?"Bucky asked honestly and saying MY name for the first time and,Man! That sounded sooo perfect!

"yeah! I mean, Why not?!"I replied casually. "we have an extra bedroom at the back that needs some work, so yeah! We could use some fresh faces in here, and I know how hard it can be to find a decent place around here". I added smiling at him, " and let's just say that you're not so hard to look at" just as I took the bottle from Steve's hands and put it on my lips.

See! the real me is coming back fast…just needs him to be around for a week and its gonna be like talking with steve…well, I was Hoping.

"hey! That's mine" steve complained

"Nop! That WAS yours…"

" But it's the last one! Moon come on.."

Thank god my phone actually chose that moment to ring.

saved by the bell!

"that's for making me look like a fool in front of your best friend" I replied while taking off to my room. the Darth Vader theme song raging in my bedroom

"Damn!" I heard bucky say…" I like her"

" yeah! I guess I see now why it worked so well between Me and her…" added steve

"hum! Why 's that" said buck without looking away from my direction0

"cause she is like you, jerk!"

"punk!" bucky replied automatically .but I could hear a hint of a smile at the end.

What was that?! " and let's just say that you're not so hard to look at"? Really, where was that coming from! Did I just …oki!not bad girl!.

After Ending the call, I changed into a classy black silk dress shirt with white skinny jeans, and of course my babies, deep blue stilettos with a slightly pointed front, with matching bag. Hair Up in a high ponytail.

Opening the bedroom door, I was confronted with Steve and Bucky sitting on the couch, watching top gear and discussing animatedly the show before them. I smiled at the picture in front of me, it's a good idea, really !Having Buck living with steve again, having his buddy back from the army was the best thing that could happen to Steve.

I approached the two boys, letting them know I was heading out.

"what happened to the Guns's T-shirt?" asked Buck surprised?

"hey, are you going somewhere?" added steve.

Bucky was once again studying my garment! And thinking?! I know that was a change from what he saw earlier.

"yeah! That was Chris, he wanted to see me!" I replied shrugging while looking at Bucky

"what happened to 'Gun's N Roses shirt?" repeated Bucky looking annoyed?!

"I refuse to go on a date with a concert shirt on, it's ugly, and no one would like it" I tried to sound convincing…and failed!

"But!...I liked it! though!" he said! POUTING again…God my heart!

Steve smiled at his buddy's comment.

"so it's a date! Hein!" he added…he looked right into my soul and continued."Have fun"

"Thanks, I will!"..I said with a smile didn't want to correct him, let him think what he wants!

" and Stevie! Don't wait up."

"K! don't get into too much trouble .." he shouted after I started to the door.

"Can't promise that!"I replied waving my hand to them without looking back. Then, I was out!

Chris, was My Ex, My first love to be exact,we've been officially together for about six years, childhood friends to high school sweethearts, then we grew up, and had to go to different colleges, it was obvious that we would grow apart with time, discussing our relationship, we agreed to put an end to it, and stay good friends.

He was really cute, and all…with Bright green eyes and dark short hair. But things didn't work out sadly.

I had a great time, it been awhile since the last time I saw him, I really missed talking to him.

"so!what's his name?" Chris asked after a particularly long silent moment, he was the best at reading me, comes with the years being one of my best friends I guess!.

I smiled, I wasn't surprised really! I knew he was to figure it all out without saying much.

"His name is Bucky,"I said without looking at him," he is Steve's best friend, he came back from the army, and I think that he's going to leave with us!

"Damn! He's fast…the son of a bitch!" Chris laughed at it, and after describing the guy…HE pretty much did this.

He looked at me solemnly, grabbed my shoulders with both arms and turned me to face him then said.

"Well, Moon….You're screwed!" and he hugged me…the fucker was sooo right he didn't even know the depth of it all. Chris knows what long hair did to me, I even made him grow it out at some point

and didn't even mention the guy's freaking persona or his way to carry himself, not even his way of looking at My fucking soul with just One glance…  
so yeah He was right!

Screwed Didn't even begin to cover it!

"good" he added later on, without missing a beat "you need to get over yourself and start a new life...its time love!" he arranged stray strands of hair behind my ear.  
"Yeah, I guess I am!"


	3. A fujoshi's mind is better with roomates

When I got home that evening close to one in the morning, I wasn't expecting what I was about to see. slipping the key through the keyhole, trying to be as quiet as possible, I somehow managed it. I was Not surprised to find the couch empty, Well, they must have gone out too. But thinking more about it, I remembered that it was a Saturday, and tomorrow, well today… steve was busy in the morning having some errand to do, so he must be sleeping,…And there is no sign of Buck, and when will he be moving? We didn't even discuss it…

I went to my room to change, got into the outfit I was wearing this morning, no need to have new ones, and laundry day is tomorrow anyway.  
Slipping into my flip-flops and headed to Steve's room to check on him.

I walked silently over to him, and just before reaching his bedroom door, deep red Vans were thrown carelessly next to the door! What the…? Oh, my heart is not prepared for this!

I peeked my head through the cracked door, as quietly as humanly manageable, and remember what I told you about having a guardian angel?! Well, I swear I could hear him singing the well known "ahh " of holiness when I finally opened the door and saw what was offered like a gift on a silver platter.

The first thing that I could manage in the dim light of the room was limbs, Bodies, On the bed, and hair!  
So I took one step ahead and finally could differentiate the limbs, a slightly darker skin, a hand was on a slightly less dark chest. so I took another step. Now It was clearer, Steve was sleeping on his back on the left side of the bed like a rock, snoring swiftly, stretched as if he was claiming the bed to be his, well it was His… the left arm hung out loosely off the bed, while the right one was comfortably used as a pillow for a darker head, which was keeping it warm with a current of soft locks covering it…

Bucky was curled to his sides, facing Steve. One leg folded and the other one stretched out. His arm was On Steve's chest and the other one was under him but slightly stretched to the empty side of the bed. Which made bucky looking like he was more on his chest than on his sides. Sleeping contently, keeping those sinful eyes at bay.

It took me a moment to grasp it properly. But at that moment, Steve's words came to mind  
"Even when I had nothing…I had Bucky." I could still hear his voice as he said that when he was telling me about his best guy…and it took me years, But I finally got to understand those words, and finally see the bigger picture.

When I think about it, I really feel like I've known Bucky myself, with all the stories Steve told me about him, I can see now why I wasn't really -thrown out- about him living with us, Not against him… nor frightened or finding it weird…. Cause in a way, It came as naturally as it was. Sure I was really surprised that Stevie had asked him to move in! , But if I'd known about his situation, I know that I would have asked him eventually. Not cause I find him Attractive…God, I really do! But because I really consider Buck to be a close friend, family even…Is that weird?!

so I ran out to my room and got my phone…it is best friend protocol to have compromising pictures of your friends, so it had to be captured… I grabbed my phone and went back to the boy's bedroom. When I went through the door the second time the door creaked slightly and I froze! oh shit! oh shit! Looking at the bodies stretched on the bed shifting swiftly. And I really sighed at the result. Steve 's left out arm came up to get into bucky's hair as he shifted to his sides, facing his best friend's frame and making him even closer to his chest as he did so, Bucky nuzzled Stevie's' neck… Thank you, Stevie.

I couldn't dream of a better position, so I grabbed my device and got to work.  
after snapping the picture I took off as soon as the light of the flash was out…Let's do not push our luck! Ohh man! Its gonna be so much fun having him around!

I went back to my room, shed the duvet, and got into bed. I couldn't stop looking at my phone, That picture was perfectly clear, and I just couldn't tear my eyes away from it.

Studying steve's expression of content that made me wonder what was he dreaming about to look like that?! And Bucky's…That beautiful dark boy so fierce and commanding curled in a ball like a five-year-old, hanging on Steve's arm like a lifeline.

What steves told me was that Bucky Barnes chose a military career after graduating High school, he was promoted to Sergeant after only One year, all for his sharpshooting skills and his cleverness, which made him the youngest sergeant of his division. Thus igniting respect all around him.

And how he came to lose his arm! Well, Steve never told me how…and I never pushed him.  
Yet looking at him sleeping like that made me think about the real James, What were his dreams?. Did he have nightmares about all the horrors he witnessed throughout his army days? how did he cope his stress? did he have a girlfriend to take care of him? someone to help him forget! and that made me go jealous.

Who am I kidding…I pretty much was already head over heels for that ghost from steve's stories, and now that I MET him…well, I let you figure that out!  
While I was lost in my thoughts, I drift out into sleep dreaming about Bucky, smiling 'til his back teeth were showing, looking like a bright angel that he deserves to be. And in my dream, I made a wish that he would never lose it.

When I woke up the next morning, I could hear the noise coming from the kitchen. I checked the watch on my nightstand, it was 10 am, so it wasn't Steve preparing coffee, he must have been out for like two hours now. Shit! Bucky.

I got out of bed, practically dragged myself to the door, the smell of fresh coffee and eggs ohh Boy I love youuu, you made breakfast!  
I brushed my teeth, combed my hair, checked myself ok let's do this!

I opened the door, started walking to the kitchen, I was greeted with the most beautiful sight that I wish to every woman to witness someday…An insanely hot guy, sizzling eggs on the pan, dressed in steve's black basketball shorts and his top tank from yesterday…bedroom hair, Rocking my dark blue apron like it was made for him. Smirking as he sees me approaching. I sat on the counters chair trying to get a hold of my heart right now. why was he looking at me like that?! And then I remembered the short shorts that I was wearing. Great!

"Good morning doll!" He puuuured…shit! My heart! Damn your Fucking morning voice and it's huskiness

" Morning!" I replied he put a full plate next to me, with him slightly bending forward, a rebellious strand of hair got on his eyes going down to his lips. and OMG I can't!

without noticing my traitorous hands moved on their own and smoothed his lock from his temples to the back of his right ear. I lingered for a second, his hair was sooo smooth and so accessible, it was right there! Just.. a bit further and I could feel it through my fingers... Then, I caught myself doing so Oh shit kill mee!  
Was he looking at me…amused? I jerked back blushing fifty shades of red again! As I sat back on the chair. he didn't say anything, no judgments nothing as if it was the most natural thing ever.

"Ahh um sorry…I.."I mumbled something I didn't even know what I would say to that! IDIOT!

"its ok Doll…thank you, though!" he said smiling while gathering his locks into a messy man bun, with a ponytail on his wrist.  
He seated himself on the chair opposite to mine and started with his breakfast. Sensing an awkward silence starting to settle I tried to make conversation.

"so..you slept here!"

"yeah," he said looking and smiling again…Come on Barnes don't you ever stop smiling its hard for me buddy some understanding here man!

I really Honestly, tried to sustain his bright gaze for a human conversation and succeeded for like four seconds, Ok its good for a morning! let's try again in 10 mins

I kept looking at his hands laboring the fork between his fingers, the way he was tapping it repeatedly was curious…was he nervous?! Is that even possible?

"so.." he started after a while, "I 'will be living here, with you…" I looked at him,

"yeah! I guess you are." I said with a faint smile, it was too awkward this weird silence so I decided to whip it off  
" I mean, as long as you keep making breakfast every morning…I will even consider doing your laundry" I joked, well not really joking.. steve sucked at cooking, and so did I.

"Done!" said our newest member that- thank god- CAN cook. he laughed, he finally laughed…Man! That is music!

"Good! I like a man who can cook." I added!  
"and I like cooking for the people I love" he replied. Looking Through me. NOT at me…shit!  
those icy blues!..wait a minute, but the pupils were dilated, like blown!…he was excited! Ohh! That is some good news.  
he was flirting….with me?..ah! so I grabbed my coffee cup, took few sips, well! Pretty much gulped the whole thing down just to get that burning feeling elsewhere than from my cheeks.

Bucky Barnes was Flirting...with me, on this fine morning…well, hello there Goosebumps! Its been a while.

I got on my feet to the sink to wash the cup clean after finishing, as I got there; I felt a close presence behind me.  
he stood there next to me in silence for about a minute then sighed.

"Thank you, Moon! Seriously" he said. I was genuinely surprised, so I looked at him, trying to decipher his expression.

"For what? I didn't do anything!" I asked

"On the contrary, you did everything." He said so softly, his voice dropping an octave, and to my surprise, he took a tip of a strand hanging on my shoulder between his thumb and index rolling it on his finger. is action was so simple yet it started a fire in my stomach.  
I just kept looking at him, not knowing how to react to that. What did he mean everything?  
noticing my confusion he added.

"For Stevie," he leaned on the counter and dropping his hand to his sides like he caught himself doing something he wasn't supposed to. ooh, buddy, here, have my head if you like!

"for taking such a good care of him…I-I never get to thank you for that." he continued

"come on! you don't have to thank me for that! He is my friend too you know!" I started. Drying the cups just so that my hands were doing something….or they would jump and violate his face.

"no, that's the thing, you didn't have to, I know how Stevie can be, but you did it anyway…and that you know, helped me so much …" he turned to face the window facing us "without knowing it, you took so much off my shoulders, "I was always worried about him, and his trouble-making nature, without me picking up the pieces after him, But…" he turned and faced me "when I knew that he had someone as Stubborn as you with him…I could relax and do my things." He smiled fondly…God! Stop with those eyes!

"Stubborn!" I said! Looking at him questionably, and yeah I was stubborn! But he seems to like it!

"yeah! And trust me that is a good thing. Steve needs people like that, I know cause I'm one of them." he laughed and patted my shoulder doing so.

"so he talked about me?!" I asked very curious about what did Stevie say to him, did he say how a massive mess I can be?

" you know when he was talking about you" he started sitting on his chair. "he had this Huge smile on his face, and talking with so much passion, and sometimes he looked soo annoyed with what you did or said to him, you know when he couldn't have his way! or how you scold him about anything he does…"

"yeah! Trust me he deserved it!"I cut him laughing.

"oh !I know!" he replied, "and to be honest, I really felt like I've grown to know you from his stories." he looked at me saying so, and My heart Oh god!

"yeah! I get that!...me too, I too felt like I've known you." I said blushing but kept looking at him. I can do this come one girl get it together! "that's why it wasn't so hard accepting you moving in here…in a way you were already a member of this little home."

"how so?" he asked surprised? His eyes were sparkling cool!

"you were like a ghost" I laughed and he giggled, "I mean, you were always floating around, Bucky this, Bucky that! So now we have the body too" I joked!

he laughed good-naturedly . I looked at him, smiling, so alive and happy, it really made my heart warm. Bucky was really a precious member of this little family. and he needed to know that!

" you're practically family buck! I want you to know that. and don't worry about anything." I said while reaching for his hand on the table.  
he looked at me, he seemed very thrown out from what I said.

"Thank you…Moon" he squeezed my fingers on his right ones, with his left hand.

"you're welcome." I smiled. "it was a good start, just keep making our delicious food and you will be just fine!" I joked to lighten the mood. and to keep me from that Glowing gaze !

"Every day, for the rest of your life." He added his Beautiful, not fair You bastard –murderous- of a smirk. the one that starts with his right side curling before the rest of his lips followed. This added gasoline to the raging war inside my stomach

"didn't ask for less Barnes," I replied not trying to overthink his wording choice  
suddenly, his eyes had that mischievous glow in them, Oh! I'm not prepared for this.

"can you promise me something little scorpion?" he asked directing his body to me

"what?" I asked 'little scorpion'…Oh! He had a nickname for me…What a glorious day…

"can you promise me that I could see you In short shorts every day."  
!

"Don't push your luck!" I turned heading to my room.

"come on doll, I will even make you pancakes" shit.. stop piercing me with ice, for goodness sake!

"shut up Barnes!" I rolled my eyes. But he didn't get to see that!

I didn't turn to see him, but from the laughing sounds that filled the hole, I pretty much hugged myself from pride…yeah…it's gonna be soo much fun having him around.


	4. Sinister hour!

Bucky moved in within the week; he didn't have much stuff,so he settled down rapidly and with small amount of complications.

we helped him, Steve and I clean the room which was unused for like three years, so we had our share of spider webs, and heavy sneezing on my part.  
opening the shades and pouring some water down on it to get rid of dirt which accumulated with the rainy days,while Bucky started to get some clothing out of the boxes and hanging them in the closet.

lifting the heavy boxes, and maneuvering the furniture, God,! he looks mouth watering right now, in his sport shorts and a black top tank, his hair disheveled from the movement,

some soft strands succeded freeing themselves from his messy bun,kept getting on his sweaty face,and that see! make my hands itch, just wants to put him down on the floor and have him between my legs, so that I can try to get a hold on those rebellious locks, just so that he would stop passing those fingers into that mane of auburn hair, which makes his biceps flex and dance in front of my eyes,

it is massively enough having him maneuvering heavy objects, and the flex from that only causes me heavy breathing...but having him stopping mid work and stretching his whole body getting that arm moving and glistening with sweat in the light of our dear lord...It's too much! and don't get me started on his metal arm!that would send my heart into overdrive

steve saw me daydreaming about his best friend, and kept smacking me with his duster. and an- I know what you're thinking girl-, -get it together- look on his face.  
I looked at him with a- I won't tell if you don't -look on mine.

Yeah! It was pretty much always like that between me and stevie, so no hard pressure.

by the end of the day, after we decided to make a cleaning day of it, and continued with the kitchen, and the bathroom as well.

Agreeing that We had our fill, we settled for" A Doing Nothing Night!", Ordering some pizza, and having a movie night...which was officially declared 'the First Movie Night' of so many to come. As a guest, well, full on roommate now !we let Bucky choose the movie we were going to watch, and the fucker settled for a horror movie. could you be more perfect right now?.

" So Sinister guys!I heard it's a good thriller, " he said looking at steve then at me. " you're welcome to squeeze in if you're afraid Moon!" he smirked devilishly.

"ha! you're soo wrong about her buddy," giggled steve sitting on the couch with two slices of pizza. "she loves Horror movies. and I think she already watched it."

"yeah! and you haven't, stevie, maybe you will have a blonde squeezing in on you instead of a brunette, Barnes"I added putting the ice tea box next on the small table and serving myself a slice.

"come on! and I was looking forward to looking cool tonight saving you from that disturbing soundtrack!" he pouted, he did it again oh! my heart!it would have been a great idea playing it weak! shit, I hate this part of myself, such a good opportunity lost. those arms and chest look soo comfy tonight, under that freshly bathed sent coming from his Tshirt.

Bucky seated himself at the other end of the couch, and patted the space between him a steve, looking very happy about himself. Ok, Barnes lets do this!  
I took it and folded my legs under me, Indian style, and the plate of pizza ready on them.

When the writer in the movie started to get the hang of the situation,I started to drift off.

I usually can put on an all-nighter easy, I was now feeling the weight of the full day that we had, so my eyes started to close on their own,

I kept fighting it, and around me, those muscular shoulders felt so comfortable and warm and the fuckers kept calling to me. I should just lean in and feel it on my cheeks. Oh! Steve or Bucky… I wanted baucky so damn hard, but come one the guys just moved in let's not make a stalker out of ourselves...yet!

Giving in, I leaned on steve on my right, seeing me trying to make myself comfortable, he lifted his left arm and put it behind my head allowing me to rest on it.  
oh! I practically moaned with the feel of it...I could rest for a bit, the movie is not ending for like thirty minutes from now, I have time.  
I started going deep into a comfortable sleep when I heard something soft and soothing.

"but am right here!" like a whisper

"give her time Buddy, soon enough don't worry!" Steve's whole body vibrated with the words.

'give her time'? what did he mean by that!...choosing what?

the next thing I remembered was being lifted, it felt like floating, but held safely into strong and protective arms, what a nice feeling, so I tried to have as much of it as I could  
I reached and locked my arms around his neck, squeezing, and burying my face into that softness..hum! He smelled so sweet, and musky...where can I buy this scent?..  
I tried to articulate some words, trying to say thank you for taking me to my bed!  
" eum! ste- ie…" was all that I could come up with.

a replay came soon enough that I couldn't comprehend, and a soft giggle, making his chest vibrate, and something was wrong with Steve's voice. It's so hard to think right now…  
felt the cold of my sheets suddenly, Ugh! cold!

" I know little scorpion, give it time." little scorpion?! ah!  
a warm hand on my forehead, a click of some lighting. Then, there were dreams.

When I woke up the next morning, a happy and sweet feeling flooded my chest, it's been a long time since I felt it…

After closing the bedroom door, he stopped and just leaned on the door for a minute, What was that about? What was wrong with him? He lifted his human hand to his chest in an attempt to feel his heartbeat! Why was it hammering like that? He just took her to her bed for god sack!, and nothing happened, well she hugged him,, and he could still feel her breath on his neck,it was so warm and her arms draped around him, Of course, she thought he was Steve, but it felt so comforting and it really gave him a sense of belonging, like he was made to take care of her,...like those arms were home...  
God! what is wrong with him? He just knew the girl for like a week!and he is thinking of her being his home?...come on Barnes! Well sure; heard about her for years, but how could he allow himself those feelings towards her, He even felt jealous after she chose to lean on steve and not on him! It was obvious that she would have gone with Steve, it's her best friend, but he was kind of hoping she would choose him,

With a tantalizing slowness, he lifted that hand to his neck and just brushed the skin where Moon's lips were and smiled fondly...He really was smitten, wasn't he! He finishes with those fingers through his locks and started for the living room where steve was cleaning their diner.

With a look from Steve, he could tell that his pal caught on everything that was happening with him, cause the little tease started smirking knowingly.

"What?" asked buck picking up his soda cup and gulping it empty.  
"Nothing.." said steve with a more obvious smile now, he took the plates and headed for the kitchen.

Bucky followed him with the rest of the cups and bottles…still lost in his thoughts.  
Knowing the look on his brother's face, steve couldn't stop himself from saying.

"You like her." he simply declared, like it was the easiest and the most simple thing to say!

He couldn't even respond to that statement! He just looked at him surprised and not so repelled by the idea. which Steve took it as a confirmation, he really knew his buddy, so if Steve caught all that from just one look, then who was bucky to contradict him?...  
Steve was the only person who could tell when Bucky is bluffing, he simply was the only person who could tell what he was thinking without even asking...knowing him better than himself, guess that's what years of friendship give you...

"I d-don't know! Do I?" he just replied...he lifted his gaze to meet his best friends, and just looked lost...  
Was he? Really like, In love with his best friend's roommate? HIS roommate, the girl that took care of his Stevie when he couldn't!...well, love was a strong word for his feelings right now.

and if he was, when did that start? Since when was he feeling those things without him even knowing about it?

He just sat, on the counter chair and looked at his hands in front of him like they were the most interesting things ever, Steve took place right next to him, he knew that Bucky was a bit slow with his emotions, not when he wanted to get into someone's pants, but as a deeper level, always been like that, trying to grasp the news, he couldn't let him do so alone.

"What makes you say that stevie?" he asked after a while without taking his eyes from his fingers

"I just know you Buck, that's just it!" he replied

"But I can't Steve, you know I can't do this to her," he said those words with so much fear in his eyes...and Steve understood what he meant by it

"You can buck, it's Ok to love someone...and god knows you need someone in your life…"he assured him.  
" I have you.!" bucky claimed. looking straight at him.

" You do buck, always, but not like that" he took his both hands in his and added

" You need someone that can do so much more than me, that can soothe you and take good care of you, I know you're afraid of your PTSD that It's ok, you need to start thinking about your future buddy, starting a new life...and who's better than Moon for that?..trust me she can take is tough. and better yet...she is worth it!" he explained.

Bucky just stood there, looking incredulously at his he even allowed to feel that?his lack of human interactions was so heavy on his shoulders, he couldn't even be in a relationship for more than three months. and that was the longest he's ever been in one.

His nightmares and terrors were the death of him, after coming back from his service. after losing his left arm was the darkest moments of his life, he literally lost himself, lost his smile and taste in life all together...so no one could stay with him, all his previous romance were a mess, and his dreams of a lasting things were shattered after a while, so he accepted it, moved on and never looked back. As from there, his life was a constant loop of one night stands, never looked for more. But sure as hell Needed more.

"What about that chris guy?" he noted

"He's her ex...they grew up together, but you have to ask her if you need more info on that subject," he replied dismissing the subject and getting up to the fridge. " I can tell you one thing, though…"

He took a water bottle and drank.

"She is more like you then you think!" he added with a knowing smile. Double meaning in his words.

"what, messed up?" he disclosed

"No idiot!" he snickered, smaking Bucky on his shoulder. " told you she is tough!"

"What then?"he echoed

"Looking for the one." stevie revealed with a soft smile on his lips,

Bucky could tell steve was hiding something but didn't ask.

"So she is single? How could a girl like that Be single?!" bucky questioned unbelievingly.

He remembered the first time he met her at steve's party, she took his breath away, with her rock band T Shirt and high heels, Damn she was a sight! But not just that, He finally get to put a face on a name after all these years of hearing stories about her, finally get to see her and know her, and hear her talk, laugh, he was so thrown out about it that he didn't even know what to say to her, ended up talking about shoes and teenage band.

"Trust me, I ask myself this question every day" steve cuts his thoughts and took place next to bucky

"What happens to her?" bucky asked, he is not ignorant if a girl like Moon chose to be alone, so it meant something must have happened.

"A constant disappointment, that's what happened to her" he started

"She is lonely, I know she is, even though she says otherwise" steve added.

" and she is very secretive about it, she hides when she is feeling hurt, but I know when she is down, she just got this look on her face, or when she reads her books or watches a movie, that moment which shows all her longing for just being in love."

"So she is a romantic!" bucky noticed smiling knowingly.

"A big one!" choked steve " and hides it with her boldness, She was hurt so many times buck, With what I could gather, No one from her previous relationships fought for her, they said they loved her but never did anything about it!I remember hearing some sniffing noises in her room after her break up, so when I went into her room she told me what had happened ,but she was so blasé like she had enough and just stopped caring, she was the only one hurting, so she chose to close her heart...and it's been like that for like four years now."steve stopped and Bucky just looked at his hands not knowing what to do after all that!

"And you expect me to add to her! Come on steve thought you were smarter than that!" he sputtered.  
" No buck, I know you...both...Trust me Buddy."he firmly cut his hand on Bucky's metal one he continued!  
"and I know that there is no one better than you for her pal, because you are the kind of man that fights for what's his...and as for her, she only wants to be needed and loved and cared for, Why do you think she puts up with me, am a handfull?" steve giggled.

"True!" bucky chuckled

"Shut up Jerk!" Steve snickered

After a comfortable silence, Bucky asked

"Do you really think I have a chance?"

"Of Course you do, Your Bucky Barnes!" steve replied happily

"No, I mean can this really go further?" he admitted

Steve just looked at his brother fondly with those big blue eyes of his, god! he really was a sweetheart!

"You have the answer to that buddy…" he said getting up "you just have to let it happen"

After dropping a good night kiss on his brother's forehead, steve heads out for his bedroom, leaving Bucky to his thoughts, steve knows that he needs to think about his feelings, so he left him to them.  
Minutes passed with Bucky leaning on the window, having the flickering city lights as his companion. He just sat there, thinking about his past, the choices that he made, he lifted his metal arm and just looked at those shifting plates, the reflection of the city lights that could get through their living room window. He needed to trust himself, again, and let other people in, if he wanted to be happy if he wanted to Live and not just Survive.

"But I have you"...  
When he got to his room, Steve shut the door behind him and just leaned on it.  
He just felt ...not lost but overwhelmed, Bucky still held him soo deep in his heart, As he held bucky in his.  
But in way, it hurt him the way his best friend couldn't move on like he had. He was happy now, he had a girlfriend, that made him happy and content.  
A girlfriend, a working girlfriend, but still, he needed to accommodate with having a traveling Geologist Dr as his lady, sure! He saw very little of her, but still, those stolen moments together made up for weeks apart, that girl was a master.

With those thoughts, he smiled thinking of his lady made him miss her even worst, so he grabs his phone and starts to write a text:  
"I miss you my lady!...can't wait to see " he hit send, and smiles to himself.  
Thinking about the pet name, His lady, and what a lady he has.


	5. take it easy!

"Not working today ?" he asked taking a full Fork into his mouth, chewing contentedly.

he has no idea how beautiful he is... every expression he arbor,every hand gesture, every averted look or a tiny smile or even when his face is expressionless ,when he is lost in his thoughts ,looking at the past ,or the future maybe!,

He has no idea about the amplitude of what I feel when he does small things like that, how smart he is even though he always said that Steve was the intellect one between the two of them .those eyes so bright and caring yet promising trouble like you only dare to dream about?  
how kind and thoughtful he can be with people ,even though he's persona is quite frightening with his rebellious looks and metal arm.

And how loving bucky is with the people he cares about...

lost in my thoughts while listening to him talking, drinking coffee and smiling awkwardly and trying to maintain appearances , that am listening to every syllable he says, just so that I wouldn't get caught day dreaming…

Since when have I started to notice those small things about him?I have no idea.

God somebody please take those pink lenses of my eyes!

" isn't that right?" he asked suddenly

let's face it how can anyone not get lost while looking at him?

Not knowing what to do, just lowered my eyes to my coffee and said the truth

"Sorry buck!I got lost for a minute" I said smiling

"Really! lost in what?" he asked while getting his face waaay to close to mine and just looking right through me.

Trying not to look at those blues, I smiled not amusingly but just not to blush .he kept looking intensively , eyes softening after a while.

Then the corners of his lips started to move upwards, given him that murderous smile and said with the sweetest voice I've ever heard.  
"a penny for your thoughts!"

oh my god what the hell Barnes?

Now my blushing was down to my neck !oh hell why does he have this much power over me without doing bloody nothing?

Bucky Barnes does not need to know what is going on in my head, hell not!

"I.. I just.., I'm " I mumbled incoherently fidgeting with my mug and food plate trying to ..just do something with my hands ...fuck it!am smoked.  
Starting to get up …

"hey" he stops me. "Doll its alright I was joking"then" Unless you were thinking about something fun!" he added smirking knowingly.

Shit, I'm busted. I blushed even worse, with him looking like he just goes out of bed, well anyway he did!  
and his hand on mine and his face so close to mine shit I I want to kiss those Rosy lips so bad and to hell with the consequences.

Wait a minute!... is he!?..  
his eyes kept going from my eyes to my lips and back again. A spark in those icy blues. was he leaning in? my heart!

Bloody fool! get your head out of the gutter. It's probably just my imagination.

" morning guys!" Said Steve from the kitchen door all sleepy and adorable, our heads snapped to his direction and well, you can guess what happened.

" Am I interrupting something?" Steve asked smiling to his ears like the little shit that he is wiggling his eyebrows knowingly.oh you prick!

Following his gaze we noticed that Bucky's hands were still on mine, so we both retrieved our hands so fast!, with Bucky's smiling amusingly and me blushing even more.

" morning punk,"Backy said, "want some coffee?"

"Thanks, jerk! yes, I do" he replied nothing happened.

" Moon, are you going to be ok? I mean didn't you have this presentation early this morning!"

Presentation what presentation? what time is it?

" Oh, shit "I barked after checking my watch.

"Fuck I'm going to be late "I sprinted to the couch where I put my bag and paper holder before having my coffee.

" You kiss your mother with that mouth" Bucky joked.

" fuck you, Barnes". I replied heading to the door.

" you wish! little scorpion" suddenly came the reply close to me,oh fucking hell how I wished that!

I turned to check why was his voice so close! And he was right behind me grabbing the front door and smiling like it was Christmas morning.

And it didn't stop there, his face was closing in even more, with it, my heart rate and he just popped a kiss on my cheek and said

" Have a nice day doll"

"Th...thanks!" I mumble floating out of the apartment.  
Hey its going to be a good day.

"Nice"  
" Oh zip it jerk! if it wasn't for you I would have kissed her already."

He took his place next to Steve facing his meal.  
steve was going through his cereals chewing loudly and grinning like a kid.

"I bet you would have" Steve added

" She's going to be okay right?" I asked worried about her.

" Yeah I think she's alright, she can make it with her driving "Steve added  
"Good," Bucky replied relieved.

"So are you up to for today?" Steve asked

"I got a meeting with Natasha, she said she can help me find a job that goes with my skill set "  
" Are you sure you're okay working with her? you know it's kind of violent what she does, is it okay with your ...you know..!" he added concerned

" I'm okay Steve, I need to try it to know, maybe it won't work but I need to know, don't worry buddy I'm okay"

"Ok, good luck buddy, I have to run, come to the gallery when you finish with her okay"

"Okay see you at 3"

It was not a good day!..well it's started good but then it kind of escalated quickly!

After I got home, an empty home at the moment !

Been fantasizing about taking a bath, a very very hot bath!

I can take my time in the bathtub, without having a blonde head Popping every now and then to try and get me out of the bathroom, because he feels lonely cuz I've been in there for a while, or that he had a bad day and wanted to talk about it .

so I stripped and in record time, got into the hot water, just RIGHT! The warm water was a blessing for my sore muscles.

it felt heavenly perfect, after this morning's battle in the kitchen between my body and my heart for the sanity of my mind.

and that meeting that seemed to go on forever. the presentation was a bit stressful but in the end, it went well and my project was accepted.

I got out of the bathtub after a good twenty minutes soaking in the wrinkling warmth, all rosy cheeks and smoking skin. got dressed in my comfy attire which was mainly cotton shorts and one size too big sweatshirt .hair dried and done in a bun above my head and a hot cup of coffee ready to go next to my laptop, and finally a warm blanket on the living room couch for some writing time since forever.

with the empty quarters, I could finally give time to my very neglected work.  
I had a storyboard to do.

Lost in my thoughts I was brought to reality by the sound of keys opening the front door. letting my roommates in, laughing, with exhaustion all over their features.

" Hey, guys " turning on the couch to face them "you're later than usual what's up ?"I asked

" got held up at work, last minute paperwork to do "replied Steve moving to the other end of the couch, grabbing my legs up and making himself comfortable by readjusting my legs over his lap. they look beat !

"You look beat" I commented

"Tell me about it !" he sighed

I tried to see Bucky mirroring his best friend on the other couch chair, letting his man bun lose.

"GOD!...my head hurts, my scalp hurts, even my hair hurts !" he deflated

"yeah !having a tight ponytail all day will give you that "I sympathized knowingly

and now he was pouting while he massaged his head with his fingers, slowly, getting through those silky strands .and what I would give to be able to do that!

Steve noticed my rêverie apparently, which explained him squeezing my foot!

"You're drooling again Moon" his eyes screamed at me !cracking a side smile

"I know !shut up "I replied with mine let me. have my moments you punk!

"so did you guys eat ?" I offered to change the subject, getting on my feet and heading to the kitchen to get dinner ready.

" No "replied Bucky

"I'm starving!" said Steve

"okay! So, go change. both of you, dinner will be ready in 20 minutes ."

"you sure you want to cook ?" he asked back

"okay boss" Steve at the same time

I smiled and headed to the kitchen.

Ok! So by fully embracing the fact that I was no chef!  
I settled for a simple recipe, a chicken soup, and a salad.  
I got a sight of Bucky out in his bedroom door and heading for the couch

"Hey Moon you need some help?" asked Bucky

" I've got it BUCK!" Steve replied, getting into the kitchen with his sleeves already up.

"okay!" said Bucky gripping the remote control and literally falling on the couch

"let us have the cooking done for once," I added

" Alright !" said Steve while clapping his hand  
" what should I do?"

"Get the table set, and wash the vegetables, I'm handling the soup. You do the salad" I instructed him

"okay chef !" replying already next to the sink.

I took a last glance at the real chef, he was sitting comfortably where I was just moments ago .with the blanket on his lap, my laptop to his side, and the remote in his hand.

he looked really tired .and he seemed restless.

"what's up with Buck?" I ask Steve when he was next to me.

"He is feeling a bit under the weather today, I think he's not sleeping lately !" he said with a concerned look in his eyes.

he really seems so out of it, his eyes glued to the TV but it was clear that his mind wasn't there.

it's been over a month since he's been living with us and I get to know what a tired Bucky looks like, this one is something else.

he seemed out of place, lost, closing on himself, seeking warmth and comfort.

And seeing him like that made me three times more protective of him, I hated seeing him like that !which pushed me to try to do anything in my power to make him better.

I hated not being able to do anything about it, while getting to the chicken I kept throwing glances at the boy on the couch, recognizing the symptoms in an away.

something is wrong on a deeper level not physical but deeper than that.  
he is in a state of needing comfort food. Do we have ice cream?  
I go to the fridge to check yes! so ice cream for dessert.

"Where was he today," I ask Steve

"on a job interview with Natasha," Steve applied

oh God! Natasha was a private detective so she could probably get him a job where he can use his skill was logical !trying to have him in the hive, he was fierce!  
but something must have happened!

" Steve! you told me that Becky has PTSD, do you think working in a violent environment will help him? and I thought you were smarter!" I said ironically

"Oh trust me! I tried to talk to him out of it, he doesn't listen, he thinks he's indestructible!"

" but look at him now! he's so stubborn, he cannot work this out he needs something completely different from what he's used to, something calm, something with a routine."  
I finished looking at Bucky, spread on the couch, lost to the world

"I will talk to him about it, it okay! don't worry I got this" i finished

10 minutes later, dinner was ready, we ate and the boys making jokes and nagging me about my cooking skills  
" it's good Moon, just joking!" said Steve "but let Bucky do it as long as he can. okay!"

" thanks, Stevie! that is so nice of you to tell me.! I hate you sometimes you know that" I replied throw in my napkin at him "you were eating it for the past four years through"

Becky was laughing at this and that was a beautiful sound to hear.

"You shut up, it's not funny!" I Scolded him

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry! "he laughed "Steve ...it's good, give her some credit, she did a great job"

" Congratulations Stevie," I said directly "you will do the dishes tonight "

"no!" he whined

"hahaha suck it !jerk "Bucky barked laughing at us both

Steve looks at me at in that moment and like magic, I understood what he was thinking "you made him laugh "as I winked at him.

Notes:

I WOULD BE SO HAPPY TO HEAR FROM YOU GUYS...  
show some love!


	6. Jump Just Jump!

"scoot over!" I said with a mouthful of Ice Cream trying to get into that tiny space between Bucky's bulky frame and the rest of the couch, where I was hours ago.

"you know there is a perfectly empty couch just right there!" he replied but started to move anyway.

"Nah! here is just fine!" I added tugging at the end of the blanket to put the ice cream ball on!God my fingers are freezing over!

"Ok! give me a minute!" he forfeited, and started repositioning himself under the soft textile" here!...".

Not giving him any chance to refuse, I filled the spoon with the chocolaty happiness and fed it to him when he turned to look at me.

The sweet taste took over the surprised look on his face, he took it all in his mouth while closing his eyes to appreciate that creamy feeling on his tongue. And was that a moan or am I daydreaming again?!

He went silent for a moment, just looking at me incredulously, and that fainting smile finally took his rightful place on his face

I wiggled my eyebrows smiling, promising mischief as usual.

Taking my fingers to my mouth to blow and warm them a bit! Bucky noticed and his left eyebrow went up!

"How is that you can grab smoking hot toasts easily with your hands and can't even handle an ice cream box for a second!?" he asked genuinely wondering.

"Well! what can I say"...I replied taking the spoon from him dragging it on the freezing surface and taking it to my mouth… "I can handle hot!..." I winked "cold?!...not so much!"

He took the box with his metal arm from where it's was on the blanket between the two of us.

"here! you won't suffer the frost bits and I will have a warm blanket!" he added, "happy now?!"

I smirked "My HEROoo"! I added dramatically batting my eyelashes cutely!well in my head it was cute...in reality...i dont know!

"uh huh!" he just rolled his eyes at me mumbling something about me being a brat! and went back to the TV.

Bucky was eating ice cream on his own now, I happily relinquished the freezing box to him.

He seemed good! But he was a good actor our Sargeant like Steve warned me days ago "he will never show his feelings, Moon, he can close himself to the people around him, and no one would know anything, he can actually be drowning and no one would know!" ha! tell me about it! am a Scorpio love...that is our trademark.

Something kept me on edge, alert, I had a feeling that we should not let him be alone to get lost in his head again, where all his nightmares stood waiting for him like dirty street dogs.

Sneaking looks with the corner of my eyes, checking on him every now and then, like Steve does from the kitchen drying glasses with a cloth. And remember that power that Steve and I share?...well our telepathy was so ON right now!

"He's good Stevie! I've got him" winked at Steve from the kitchen counter, "I know you do !" he nodded in response.

Minutes passed, and Steve joined us, laying on the other couch his book in hand. After a stubborn moment resisting to fall under, Bucky fell asleep, in a sitting position, head leaning back exposing his throat, his bun getting looser with every move. Hugging the blanket for dear life.

He wasn't comfortable obviously, his head kept searching and repositioning for that resting position, and with him being a stubborn son of a bitch, he resisted to lean back on me, being the logical choice here! Accepting his fate after a while and gone still for a bit.

he was finally under in a heartbeat, I lifted my arm and just made him lean on my shoulder, his neck finally finding some sort of relief.

Steve passing me the small cushion behind his back, put it on my thigh, readying it for him.  
I finally dragged him down to it, he ended up laying on his left side, head Finally comfortable

"we should wake him, he should go to his bed!" I said to Steve  
"Nah, if he wanted he would have done it by now" he replied." he doesn't want to be alone, he does this sometimes, generally when he would be feeling bad... I've learned to read the silent cry with time.!" he finished with a lingering look to his best friend

Agreeing completely, Steve went back to his book. and me to whatever the hell was on TV.

For the life of me, I still can't tell you what was on TV,...

Buck's soft and steady breathing was the star of that evening, and I couldn't dream of a better show.

we were so happy that our boy could finally get some long awaited rest, even for an hour at would be a win at this point.

Stevie said that Bucky wasn't sleeping lately and even had to go to his room and try and have him rest for at least three hours every night.t my complete ignorance!, it looks like Bucky needed the company to vanquish that restlessness he brought with him when he got back from his last mission. he seemed to sleep easy when Steve was there with Stevie would do it even if was the last thing he 'd do!.  
and who wouldn't! I mean, having that giant bear clinging to you for safety all night! WHERE DO I SIGN PEOPLE?!

Half an hour passed peacefully, and like on cue his restlessness seemed to creep up on him.  
he started to move,...was he dreaming?

Suddenly, He looked in pain! agitated .what should I do?! you fucking jinxed it! you idiot!

I looked at Steve for help.

"I can't do anything, he has to go through it himself!"  
"But we should wake him up or something,?" I asked not knowing what to do, and I fucking hated it!  
"I did it one time, woke him up, well….let's just say it wasn't a good idea!" Steve replied with the memories dancing in his eyes. "let him deal with it Moon, try to talk to him, it seemed to work when I did it!"

Not having any control over my limbs, my hands took the liberty of taking that ponytail of hell from his VERY LOOSE BUN now! and slowly freeingMY DAMN WEAKNESS from the black elastic, getting his Auburn tresses over the pillow.

After that, I just plunged my fingers in his hair and started massaging his scalp.

And by the stars and MOON, he moaned! he fucking moaned people!  
OH heavens, what a music!

"Oh, that is so cute!" Steve interrupted my heavenly moment of happiness  
"you're blushing Moon!"

I didn't comment, just smiled, I just didn't give a monkey's ass about what he could think of me right to our surprise, Bucky's body started to relax, his breathing calmed and evened out.AND that was A FUCKING WIN!

"Well! I'll be damned!" commented Steve "who knew!"  
"What?" I asked," I didn't do anything.!"

"Just keep doing what you're doing….it's working!" he added behind us now, took the blanket and arranged it on Bucky.

"Oh! I could do this all day," I replied with a wink. knowing he would get the reference.  
he laughed

"I know you could!" he finished with a kiss on my forehead and giving me the remote control "you're not working tomorrow?" he asked "Nah! am working from home this week" I replied "don't stay up too long then, good night"

" I won't! 'night buddy! " I whispered taking the remote and putting supernatural on, I had some catching up to do anyway.

...

Bucky kept moving and turning in his sleep BUT didn't seem to wake up anytime soon.

Like Steve had suggested, whispering sweet nothingness to his ear, and dragging my palm on his skin, seemed to do the trick.

The creases between his eyebrows softened a bit, but his sad features were still the same.

He was on his back now, trying to lay comfortable, but it looks like that my thighs and the pillow under his neck were starting to weight on his neck,

In a swift motion, eyes still closed, he took the pillow out, throwing it on the ground in a heartbeat!  
hand in the air, I froze like a thief caught in action, did not dare to move an inch!but he kept invading my body like a claimed territory.

So ladies and gents! Bucky Barnes ended up sleeping on my chubby thighs! his dark locks spreading all over them, I could feel the warmth of him spreading and breathing on my skin!

Thank you brain for making me take a bath ANd deciding to wear shorts instead of pants!

And as if all that wasn't enough!... He did what I have never expected to see from him, an actual cheek rubbing like a contented cat .all that was missing were the purrrssss!

OOook!let's see if we can have that too!

Testing the waters, with a shit-eating grin on my face. I lowered my hand carefully back to his hair my palms over his my nails delicately on his scalp.

Come on! it's not like I wasn't gonna play with it! where in hell am I gonna have a chance like this? you think the opportunity of having him LITERALLY on your lap will be A COMMON THING from now on?!...well yeah! in MY dream world, or your fan fiction...any who!l

Let me play people, and don't judge!

SO focus!... Me, playing with his hair...

a few seconds later, with the softest caresses that I could master right now, try and failing to ignore the tingling that was starting to play house in my stomach. light scratches of my fingernails claimed one territory after another and getting acquainted with his scalp down to his rough skin with the start of his beard

AND WE HAVE A WINNER! yes! it's happening people! this is not a drill! a very Very smooth groan was in the a purr but a guttural groan nonetheless! wait! is he smiling!?

"what are you dreaming about!?" I said to whoever was listening…dragging my eyes to his luscious lips and had a swift tip of his tongue between them as a reply!

Dean was talking to Sammy about some British dick head!( Dean's words), being ambushed over something or another...still didn't know what was the episode about though!  
It looks like me catching on the show was a no-go, when I had a sleeping Buck nearby.

Finally declaring forfeit and just switching the TV off. I tried getting myself comfortable and ready for 's good that I don't have to be at the office in the morning...yeah! a graphic designer has its perks.

but little that I knew, was that making yourself comfortable was not an easy task when you have a giant cinnamon roll hugging the hell out of your legs.

BUT I accept anything if it meant waking up next to him…" oh! what a beautiful thought!" said my heart to my eye-rolling brain.

Bucky was now on his stomach, his flesh arm somehow under my thigh, yes! that sounds impossible but THAT'S WHY I SAID huGGING THE HELL OUT OF MY LEG!

Anyways! moving with the speed of a lazy snail, carefully now that he left me with no choice but accepting my fate and just leaning to my right side tucking myself between his sides and the back of the couch.

I could only reach as far as his waist, just above the small of his the small couch cushion to support my head, and I couldn't dream of a better sleeping position.let's be honnest...sour neck be damned!

It was like 69'ing but more"Kawai than Hentail".haha ..ok get your head out of the gutter you pervs!

Finally settling down, ready to by his musk! 'ok, there is no way using the word -musk- and NOT think about something dirty!  
I hereby allow you to do so!

After a while his restlessness was back, he started twitching and saying unintelligible words tugging on the blanket hard...

I was glad that wasn't my thigh he was grabbing cuz, GOD! that would have bruised!

"sssshht! I got you! ...am right here 's ok! go back to sleep"I soothed, dragging my free hand on his large back...I Couldn't reach his head anymore without angling up a bit, so his hair was out of the way…-to my heart's break-

I made sure to keep a constant contact with him,(my entire buddy clade to his was out of the equation! of course) in my defense, he seemed to need it, so who was I to deny him that?!

Void of any stress, and totally relaxed, a peaceful face which he can never harbor while awake took place.

I smiled fondly, and with the last attempt I ventured my hand to his face, I wished I had my phone so that I could snap a picture of him sleeping...next time!

he shifts unconsciously moving closer before nuzzling his nose against the palm of my hand and it's in that moment, I realized How far gone I was for this man.

GOD! those sweet, sweet fluters in my belly were the answer I needed

Why do I always feel the NEED to help and take care of him, why do I always fall for the broken souls? this stupid and childish illusion that I could save them is so powerful, like a drug given to the ultimate addict, the feeling of being needed is the most intoxication rush I've ever felt before…

But, the icing on the cake was that, how can I heal someone when I was the one needing it the most?

Helping a broken soul when I was broken myself!

The realization hit me like a rock, If I wanted to save him, I should first start with MYSELF.  
allow me to trust people again, learn to open my heart again.

I've been alone for so long now...that I can finally admit that I became a recluse in a way!

I've been disappointed too many times, I ended up putting them all in the same bag.  
every time I felt anything for anyone, I eradicated that feeling from its roots…to protect me from that ache again.  
no more sleepless nights, no more ruined days thinking about what I could have done to make him fight for me, to prioritize me.

and the joke was that I've been told that I was "the perfect girlfriend", they came to find the girl and the friend in with the same ending...where was the truth in that?

if they ended up leaving me?!

It is known that independent woman ARE OVERWHELMING for some men. And being alone for some time, you learn to be very self-satisfied, and VERY independent, so one plus one equals...

I could feel myself falling for Bucky, 'caus let's face it! who couldn't!?he is the personification of my wildest dreams, walking every day under my nose.

In all my stories and comics, I put some of my version of "a perfect man" in my characters,  
in a way, Bucky seemed to have them all, so I was bound to fall easily and So VERY HARD over Bucky Barnes.

Now that I remember; Steve was the first one to notice that about me, with every one I brought to meet him, he ended up saying" yeah! it won't last long!"or he is no Buck!" nagging me, and proving that he knew me better than I knew myself, that little shit!

which is why he did everything in his power to bring us together maybe? that little shit! I need to have a talk with him.

I was bound to fail, just didn't have the guts to accept it.

I was in love with Bucky Barnes

how did I ever ?...when did it happen? how could I?! he is Steve's best friend for god's sake! it couldn't be more stereotypical .okay he was so fucking hot and thousand percent my type but this doesn't give me the: right to claim him mine!

Now that I think about it!... when was the last time I fell in love with someone? they say that when you stay single for long period Of time, you become less needy and get to be less trusting in the opposite , that is just fancy words of saying that you're broken.

And that moment my heart chooses to try and argue with me by telling me that' bucky is broken too and that you can learn to heal together' awww! "SHUT IT you, romantic idiot! Life is not a fairy tale and it's not that simple "my mind seemed very pissed at the moment

With that thought, he shifted and turned to face my stomach. I went rigid, not Daring to move! Oh! for the love of all that was sweet and chocolaty, please stop killing me!

he nuzzled my stomach and have his metal arm around my waist and hugging so tight that it gave me goosebumps as if that wasn't enough to kill me he chose that moment to groan in content.

I checked my wristwatch and sighed, it was 2 a.m. it's going to be a very very long night.

Fuck you brain, this is not the time for this kind of self-realization.

Am so tired! I Breathed out. Finley ready to go under.

Notes:

pls leave any comment, I would love hearing your thoughts...


	7. Through her eyes

So warm and soft, what is that? before he opened his eyes he tried to feel his surroundings, he got used to doing so in his army days. so the first thing he registered was the 's usually the opposite, he would wake up with a freezing feeling all over his libs, weird!

He was covered with a soft blanket, very soft and furry to the touch.

he moved his head a bit, this is not a pillow he though, something soft touching his nose

a sweet smell filled his senses, something chocolaty and he knew this fragrance, always smelled like hot cocoa after showering...but, why is he thinking about her after a shower? he still fuzzy with sleep, and he can't think straight, not before his coffee…

what the hell is this? is someone in my arms? without uttering a word, He stills, felt a steady up and down between his arm and that was where that warmth came from.

Not daring to open his eyes yet God did I fell asleep in Steve's bed again? I don't remember going to his room last night. wait! I don't remember going anywhere last night except for the couch! ...on the couch with ...Oh shit!

At that moment all those huge limbs went as rigid as a statue 's, he tried to focus more, it was raining heavily outside today, which was expected in October.

He smiled, that was nice. He likes rainy days.

Moving his metal hand very very slowly to try and 'pinpoint' what is he exactly holding to start his evacuation strategy.

so , up a bit to the north, a ! a bone.a hip bone! shit it's was her waste, he is holding her on her waist

"Oh heavens!" he fell asleep on moon's lap last night and he is still holding her in the middle.

he went on and opened his eyes and the first thing covering his vision was pink! well, skin and a belly button right in front of his eyes. that's warm softness was her skin he thought warmly and bit the inner walls of his cheeks keeping himself from blushing?OMG Barnes, you are not a teenage girl! he rolled his eyes at himself this time.

first things first, he untangled himself from her as slowly as he was capable of, stopping in track at every reaction from her.

Damn! he was a trained soldier for goodness sake, he could be faster about it! but It wasn't something that comes easily when he was trying to not wake up a sleeping girl who had a rough night because of him.

he smiled, another kind of rough night could be fun !he caught himself thinking…

fell onto the ground at the foot of the couch, finally free ..well, the wrong choice of wording here.

he wasn't captive or, he wished to be?! he smiled again, it's funny how everything changes, a whole new perspective comes to view, and wish to belong to someone at a certain point of your life.

on that pleasant thought, he got up and finally looked at that warm creature who kept him safe from his dreams last night.

he could look at her now she had her hair on her face covering her eyes completely, it looked done on purpose cuz it was impossible to have that much hair covering one area of the face. so she did it because of the early morning light coming from the large window in the living room .she must have slept very late. he deduced.

"she used her hair as a cover eyes "he chuckled,"weird girl!" smirking fondly, a gentle smile on his face.

sliding his arms under her to get her to her room, lifted her like she waited for nothing "let's get you somewhere comfortable" he murmured.

she groaned and hugged his chest, then rubbed her upper cheek with a closed left hand like a cat just under his eyes, mumbling something unintelligible.

"oh that is very cat-like little scorpion!" he whispered smiling

he pushed the door of her bedroom open and slipped inside. located the double bed still made because of him! dragging the covers down with one arm and tucked her in.

last time he did so she groaned complaining about the coldness of the sheets under the blankets. no changes today too, still making those complaining mewls. this time he muffled a laugh

" I know to give it time doll"

with a last adjustment of the covers to her shoulders, he lingers for a bit , and just without overthinking about what he was doing, he caressed her sleeping face with a soft fingertip tracking and arranging that rebellious hair of caught himself smiling at that…

he started to head outside when he noticed that it was actually the first time he was in her room when it was light outside. the last time was at night and the lighting was very dim, courtesy of the black shale over lights on either side of the bed! so he couldn't see anything that stepped out!

now, on the other hand, he could see everything, so he took everything in.

someone's bedroom is another aspect of their personality, you can learn so many things about a person just by looking into their room. and Moon's room was the exact image of herself.

bucky couldn't help but be completely taken by the place, after watching what looked like "la piece de resistance" in moon's room. the un-ending shelves of shoes.

it was a pretty spacious room, with one large window next to the messy desk and a small one next to the bed facing the left side, where she is currently at what must be the bathroom door at the end of the wall.

the shoe wall was fully covered from left to right with numerous types and styles of footwear, the boots at the bottom, going up with stilettos, and sandals and other names for other shoes...with every color and all were high heeled….

he smiled again, she sure loved her heels.

but one, in particular, took his attention, it's was on the third shelf next to the desk,

a black leather stilettos, with the leather, pinched in a decorative way at the front making it look like it was gathered on the foot holding the flesh in,the high heel was also leathery he remembered it from the first time he met her, she was wearing it with that scorpion's t-shirt.

the shoe was gorgeous, and with those skinny and never-ending heels, he had to admit that it was sexy, what can he say, high heels did things to a man. when it was on the legs that came with it…hum, what a nice thought!

putting the shoe back where it belonged, Bucky turned to the desk, it was two sets of desks actually, which was covered with so many papers and half-finished drawing, and what looked like comic panels where the computer screen and the massive designer's tablet weren't already occupying…

upon the wall, was another set of shelves, but those were mainly occupied with comics and books and so many figurines and action figures...Ok, so this girl was a massive geek! he smiled again, well it wasn't a surprise really, just looking at her every day with those black rimmed glasses reading and fangirling over Tv show characters was a red flag! the giant posters on the wall helped too,

two posters actually caught his attention, one was a bunch of superheroes grouped together posing victoriously,and what looked like a leathery clade dark character with long hair on the second one, he noticed that the character in the middle with the blue costume and the white "A" on his helmet and a giant star with three stripes on his chest was weirdly familiar, with those blues piercing you ,and a "Captain America" written across the bottom half of the page,

he could see more because of the poor lighting at this side of the room, with the window shades closed, there wasn't much light getting in.

he noticed some unfinished works too on the desk, taking an interest he dragged his hand on the paper, try separating some from the others just to see what was on them.

it looked like a comic panel, with the same blue costumed guy and the 'A 'on his head but this time it's unfinished.

he put his flesh fingers on the paper which was covering another drawing, sliding it delicately to the left to reveal what's under it, a strange feeling that he wasn't supposed to see this In the back of his mind…

he turned his head to look at the girl on the bed sleeping soundlessly, he lifted the paper and couldn't believe his eyes…

It was a black and white drawing of him, sitting next to the living room window with a glass of hot coffee suggested by the smooth pencil shading like smoke ,he was lost in his head with loose hair, hugging himself with his metal arm, looking at the twinkling lights blurred by rain on the glass window…

the subtle work set a mood, he looked so sad, and lonely, and lost, and so many other things at once...but the saddest part was that he remembered feeling all those things when he was indeed sitting there the last time he had a talk with Steve about letting go...and taking chances.

he couldn't believe that she saw him that night! he thought he was alone! but something's not right, he had his hair down here, and he wasn't wearing a white shirt! he was in a hoodie and had his hair up, so this wasn't a reproduction! she didn't watch him that night, it was imagined!

ok, now it makes more sense, 'cus he was the one getting her to bed that night too after she fell asleep on the couch. he smiled fondly,; it looks like it's a pattern starting to form!

and he was so ok with it!

eyes back on the paper, for the last time, so this is how he looked through her eyes?!

a lost puppy!? craving affection and love?!...he closed his eyes and headed for the door, trying to forget about the picture now in his head.

"so, had fun last night?"

"geez" he barked out very surprised! "you startled me you punk!" he said getting to the coffee machine.

"good morning!" replied Steve smugly

"you've been sitting here all along?" added bucky

going to the kitchen cabinet, and pouring the hot black liquid in the mug which said ' don't' talk to me before this, or else they will not find your body' which was a housewarming gift from Moon after he settled in.

"Y-Yeeep!" relied on steve mockingly, he is having so much fun right now!

"ugh! grow up!" bucky eye-rolling at his brother and resuming his task of trying to properly wake up!

settling on the counter next to steve's which matched his mug stating 'don't be fooled by my doe eyes,or you'll be disappointed!' with three exclamation points on it.

Bucky smiled at that, she really is something else, isn't she! steve noticed his good mood and took a sip concealing his loving smile

"did you know she drew me?" said bucky after a comfortable silence, eyes still on his coffee

"yes, I did, what did you think about it?"

" I don't know, I guess I, wasn't ready to see myself through someone else's eyes, looking that pathetic, " silence,"...and ..sad …"he finished his sentence looking at Steve earnestly,

" pathetic? really! " said Steve surprised,"what made you think that?"

"Oh I don't know Steve, maybe the way I was sitting, lamenting and almost crying and looking at the rain?!"Bucky replied defensively, he hated talking about his feelings when he knew he could do shit about it!

how can someone as strong as Bucky belittling themselves like that! steve asked himself this question

regularly since his brother came back from the horrors he lived through this past was never like that! ever! Sam was righ t,it's never the same person coming home from war!

"you!?, looking pathetic! wait a minute, I'll be right back"he cut him, and he headed out to his room with a purpose and emerging back out after a few seconds.

"are we talking about the same thing?"he emphasized his words with a thud of a bunch of comics on the table

"you, Bucky Barnes, looking pathetic through her eyes!?" he added this time with softer voice,"look closely Buck, you're the opposite of pathetic and sad!"

"wait, what is this? " asked bucky surprised and dismissing the portrait,to see what's in front of him.

"what you actually look like in her mind" replied steve with a proud smile on his face

there was the same blue costumed guy again, the one that looked familiar to Bucky, now he knew why! if he didn't, the repeating name 'steve Rogers' must have helped a bit!

"Stevie, is that you!?"he asked with an endearing twinkle in his grey eyes,

"yep! am a superhero Buck!" Steve added posing like his comic on his hips and that squared jaw turned to the left, intimidating a ghost sitting on the couch maybe?!

"haha! that is so cool!" he laughed this time.

"wait , check this one out" added steve while flipping through the pages of the comic and stopping in track at a black clade leathery menace of a man, with long hair and a metal arm.

Bucky needed a minute to grasp everything in front of him,the man was dressed with full black on black, pants and a one-sleeved jackets, all the works.

His face was covered with a mask looking like a mussel and goggles covering pretty much all his face except for the little spacing of his forehead, with a sniper rifle on his back .a hunting knife and a handgun on either side of his thighs, with some heavy boots and knee protection.

A red star was painted on his metal arm, gloved. the other was holding another gun." the winter soldier" written in red cornered with white.

"am...that's supposed to be me?"he asked completely thrown by the situation

"yep,you're a menace. Buddy!" you should read it,"he started to get up ,"I think we have all the numbers in the library" he added heading to the shelves under the giant TV,he noticed a bunch of books there.

"it..it wasn't a comic book, but... a portrait…"he said softly, looking at the pages or at something beyond them, Steve couldn't tell.

"yeah, she does that sometimes…"he replied

looking at the art again,Bucky was mesmerised by the details,the colors and the story of the winter soldier,he will so read it!it's not every day you discover that you're actually a superhero,well, correction a deadly assassin ,a ghost who ends up being a hero ,what stevie summarized for him in a minute.

He remembered seeing some sketches of the soldier on her desk too, and that ginormous poster on her wall.

"the soldier!"he found himself murmuring, like a name of an old friend,or a something closer than that...one thing was sure, he was alluring.

"is this really what she thinks about me? "

"huh! you'd be surprised bro!" finished steve emphasizing his words with a gentle and ferme pat on bucky's shoulder., getting up to the sink.

"and you never thought about telling me that sooner?I don't know,like-hey buck, you know I'm kind of a superhero and your my sidekick!-kind of way?"

"well, it did cross my mind but then, it wasn't something so far-fetched i mean she was always very Biographical in her using her friends as fictional characters weren't much of a surprise! annd you're not my sidekick!"Steve answered eloquently.

"yeah but…."

"just read it, you'll find them all in there, Nat, clint,ohh you will love Tony's character. well actually Tony is the only one who isn't playing a character, she just put all of his life and just gave it to the world to behold!and he couldn't be more happy about it!" steve continued while rinsing his mug and telling his story with a bit of 'so done with the man' all over his face!"a genius , billionaire playboy philanthropist as he puts it"

"and you my friend,...she made you from my stories" he continued, this time the soft and loving, and so much care for this man in front of him was all over his face again,"she asked so many questions, she wanted to know everything about you, about our life growing up!

that's why she could portray you so vividly"

Bucky looked at the pill under his hands,for once, he was excited to see what person he'd be in this pages. maybe it will help him rediscover himself all over, with the help of Moon.

"I have to go buck, , tell me what you think about them later ok?" said Steve heading to the table next to the window to grab his keys." she's still asleep?"

""yeah, she didn't sleep well last night!"

"and who's fault was that!" accused steve teasing him

"oh shut up jerk!i didn't mean to fall asleep like that, am already embarrassed!"so don't add up to it!"

"hehe, you shouldn't be,I bet you a week of dishes that she enjoyed it!"

"yeah, yeah! i was a treat!" he mocked half hoping for it actually!

Bucky zoned out for a bit, remembering last night's events, how safe he felt last night.

and how none of his nightmares came for his sanity for once, since forever!

how he fell asleep so easily when he spent hours just tiering his body so that he would just shut down hoping to never wake up at times when it was particularly hard.

"…..starting early, but." Steve continued then stopped on track.

"what...sorry,I was lost for a bit"

"does it surprise you that much?" Steve added after a short silence, studying his friend for a second..

"what does?" asked bucky

"how easy it was!" he added

Bucky didn't have to answer, as always leave it to good old Stevie to give words to his thoughts.

"yeah…"the softest reply came to his ear, wasn't even sure if it was for him or for himself!

stevie smiled and already opening the front door.

"don't forget your umbrella" shouted bucky, and at that moment, the weather outside chose to let everyone know that he was no joke at this time of year! making everyone notice him with a blinding set of lightning and a striking growl of thunder

"shit completely forgot about that!" he grabbed one in the closet next to the door,

"what would I be without you!" he added while blowing a kiss in the direction of his brother!

"yeah yeah! you'll be wet that's what!"he relied upon dismissing his idiot of a jerk!

"who would be wet?" a third member finally came to play!

"Me, if I didn't have a loving Bucky to remind me about the very nice weather outside!" joked steve

"I see, what a lucky bastard!." she added "wish we all had one! do you lend him perhaps...i'll be very generous and pay fairly!" she continued with the joke!

Bucky just rolled his eyes, which were mirroring the color of today's weather! a stormy grey, with a set of lightings of their own when he had something in mind!

"Just gerra a'here!"

Moon and steve were both laughing earnestly, Steve finally headed out after winking at his girl! "see you two later!"

"say Hi to pepper for me," said Moon. just before the door closes.

"good morning Love!" she finally turned to face a suddenly nervous Bucky Barnes!


	8. Acceptance is the first step!

A thunderous moment woke her up, after a brief surprise, a smile shaped her mouth waking up knowing the weather was going to be beautiful today.

"Ummh" it's raining…perfect!

she thought, not opening her eyes just yet, just listening to the colliding droplets on the window glass and over the rooftops, the city's brouhaha muffled by the pouring water.

that -tak-tak-tak sounded so soothing and calming to her, like millions of tiny soldiers marching.

she loved rainy days, felt inspired already!

she needed to be in a productive mood right now with a new project to work on, and a rainy day accompanied by numerous cups of hot cocoa always helped. the last time she stayed home on a day like this, Captain America was born.

She smiled and took her time stretching under the cover, a hand drifting on the sheets on either side of the bed,'Wait, I'm in my bed! How did I get here? she jolted opening her eyes finally!

"Oh God! last night!" she blurred out sitting up in her spot, and finally the event of last night played and infolded in her head.

she could still smell Bucky on her, the feel of him next to her, hugging her like his lifeline,his steady soft breathing interrupted by those frightened moans his demons brought out of him sometimes,

the scratchy feeling of his beard on her skin, she never thought about having a beard burn could feel pleasant, now it's an alluring idea.

she rolled her eyes smiling at the thought.

The sweet and peaceful sound of relief which he let out when she dragged her fingers in his hair, she wondered if he liked it or was it just good timing with something else!

The force and the possessiveness of his embrace when his nightmares were too much.

"God!what am I doing?!" she sighed putting her head in her hands, embarrassed as hell, and certainly ashamed of the effect he has on her!

She wanted him so bad, and he was so close but she could not have him.

And the most shameful things was how in the hell did she allow herself that?to go that far, when was she even that girl!?

She had never thought that she could be that clingy toward someone, let alone her best friend's best friend! But apparently, when Bucky was involved, 

her logic went out of the window.'see you bitch, I'll be back when Bucky's gone to another planet or shaved his hair!'

"Ugh! Shin will kill me!" with that though, the dark room did help!she gets to wallow in her despair and shame for more minutes.

Locating her phone and scrolled down the contact list, when she found her number, she opted for a text instead.it's was nine o'clock here, it must be night where she was.

Now that she calmed down thinking about what would she tell her,'Hey baby,so I kind of fell in love with steve's Best Friend, and he might never see me like that though,I mean, it was clear that he wasn't a relationship guy,you could tell with his flirting with EVERYBODY! and had trust issues, Ha! the story of my life!and don't forget PTSD and night terrors. so, yeah I'm all good! I mean, for years I tried to fall for someone, and ended up falling with the only person who can not reciprocate! I mean, can I be more pathetic?UGH kill me please!"

she rolled her eyes at herself, and just settled for a simple one, leave the drama for later.

"Hey Baby,...tu me manque tellement!" ( I miss you so much!)

she added a kissing emoji and she pressed send.

Now that she's facing the picture, shin was like the compass always pointing north in Moon's life, she was her best friend since high school, and pretty much the sanity lifeline of Moon. Her emotional shelter and safe house. It's been a while since she spoke with her, and it was starting to weight.

she was sure of one thing though,her girl will kick her ass if she didn't do shit about it,Moon knew that she would support her for everything and would be pissed if Moon didn't jump on any opportunity coming her way, fuck the concoinces, just have fun and go for it,with on condition, don't get attached! if the relationship will never work, get all over it for nothing, have fun but don't let go...this is what she would say to her!

Resolving to finally go out of bed, she froze once again.

"He must be up!" she …thought, what if he felt weird about it, and didn't mean it or thought it was inappropriate and it will ruin everything we have so far!? what would I do? how should I react, should I just accept it and just go with it? Shit, it's heading to 'IT'S COMPLICATED!' so fast at this rate!

They were best friends now, living with someone practically forced it, and true it wasn't a bother, but still! she loved him and cared for those boys so much, but still, it didn't give her the rights to be all handsy and overwhelming.

she wanted to be his friend, but she also wanted to tangle her limbs with his and never let go!

Bucky Barnes is quite a gentleman, a flirty gentleman. But also a giant flirty teddy bear, who hates wearing shirts and sometimes walks about in his -barely hanging there- sweatpants,

just under his happy trail, and It always makes her wonder if he does it on purpose! Still, she is not complaining AT ALL!

See, it's not all my fault, I mean how can I not have those sinful thoughts all day and ...and..he is NOT HELPING MY CASE!'

"Ugh! stop over thinking everything girl! and just go with it!" she said to herself

After mastering the guts to get out of the room, she did what she did best, not giving a monkey's ass about what he may think...for now! and just go through her day naturally

.But it didn't keep her from checking her outfit three times!

Finally out, she was greeted by the legendary duo chatting about something, just caught the tale end of a joke Steve is making.

"Who's gonna be wet?" going with the joke.

"Me, if I didn't have a loving Bucky to remind me about the very nice weather outside!" joked Steve

"I see, what a lucky bastard!." she added "wish we all had one! do you lend him perhaps...i'll be very generous and pay fairly!" she continued with the joke!

Bucky just rolled his eyes, which were mirroring the color of today's weather! a stormy grey, with a set of lightings of their own when he had something in mind!shit shit shitt!

"Just gerra a'ere!"

Moon and Steve were both laughing earnestly, Steve finally headed out after winking at his girl! "see you two later!"

"Say Hi to pepper for me," she added.just before the door closes.

"Good morning Love!" she finally turned to face a suddenly nervous Bucky Barnes! Oh my! this could be fun!

Bucky replied with a sweet sweet smirky curving of his lips, parting to let out a "Morning Doll !" a soft yet raspy morning voice filled with comfortable sleep and hot promises followed by a soft kiss on her cheek, and that! see?! DAT WASN'T FAIR!

Changing that smug and 'yeah; I can make fun of you like Steve does' into a blushing cuteness on Moon's face, Bucky felt pride and complete joy when he confirmed it to himself that, he still got it!.

She ended up blushing all the way to the kitchen and busying herself with coffee

reaching for the kitchen cabinet door and taking the black coffee mug with angry white ninja eyes, and filling it with her morning fuel.

Bucky went back to his seat at the table resuming his breakfast, still giddy about what he just did. joined by Moon after a second, painting her toasts with Nutella, taking her time like painting a canvas.

Looking at her, not bothering to hide his amusement, and watching her browning that bread like an artist! very carefully under the watchful eyes of her angry mug.he noticed she used that specific mug when she stayed home. which meant...

After Steve took off it left them alone in the apparently, Alone, and it was raining, and freezing and so very ALONE!

it wasn't their first time just the two of them, but with last night's events, everything was heightened. and Bucky didn't have anything today, he was planning on staying in,

thinking he had the apartment for himself, he thought about finishing his work from home.

working with a friend had its perks, and since he started working with Natasha, he could do that paperwork wherever he wanted, just as long as he respected the deadlines.

today was a rainy day, and he didn't feel the need nor had the strength to go outside.

and apparently, Moon thought the same!

The realization hit them at the same time, that hateful awkward silence settling in on them like a morning mist over the city.it's was palpable!

trying to avoid that, both of them said the first thing coming to their minds just to break the silence

"It's raining…"

they ended up stating the obvious at the same time.

After a few seconds of acknowledging the situation here, they ended bursting into laughter about how stupid that was.

Trying to ease up her nerves a bit, she reached out to her cup of coffee and drank from it without thinking twice about the scalding temperature of the mug.

"umm.. ugh hot..hot ..ho" she sputtered trying to touch her burning lips!

" shit! are you OK? is it bad? let me see!" he exclaimed! reaching for her face

taking charge already bringing the water glass to her

"drink!" he ordered.

she did, and they locked eyes for a split second stretching out to eternity…which was the first time that morning after the kiss….finally!it was just a kiss! and a cheeky one for that matter! who was avoiding who?

she forgot the burning for a second there, lost in his stormy concerned eyes, and that burning feeling was transported to the nether reagent of her body in un instant.

Ok, now she remembered why she was trying to avoid his gaze!damn you ovaries!!

Avoiding the humiliation of someone reading what your eyes are screaming can only be described as a protection mechanism just like putting on a mask, yet being afraid of making a fool of yourself over little things can give you a huge amount of satisfaction when you forfeit and just plunge in that situation and just accept and work with whichever consequences that may or may not come your way.

in her case, it was like discovering those orbs for the first time, all over again.

those clear and gentle, yet so possessive and caring grey orbs were mirroring outsides weather, with a bit of blue flashing his concern, softening to that baby blue when reassured of no danger after a while.

"..Beautiful!..." she gasped over the cold glass of the water fogging it with her breath at the attempt of subsiding the burnings of her lips!

OH dear god please, I did. not. just .say that out loud!! fucking kill me already!

" what?..."

she blushed even more! not losing the way his eyes kept traveling between her lips, flat against the transparent surface between her fingers, and her eyes.

He remembered the time when Steve used to do that, flattening his mouth on window glass waiting for him to come out and play, all childish and idiotic,making faces to him leaving his often cut lips prints on the window which wins him a scolding from Bucky's mom and a lecture form bucky about microbes and germs and health issues while disinfecting the cut all over again!

without knowing it, he found his thumb venturing to her lips caressing the pain away…

"Hi" he whispered, hand still on her face, thumb venturing to the side

"..h.Hi"she replied with the same adoration in her voice.

it was stupid to be nervous, not with him… It's bucky, why was she all stressed out about it!

"are you Ok Moon?" he insisted!

"am fine!" she cleared her throat "thanks, Buck! it's nothing...you know I'm clumsy!t" she added averting her eyes hiding her blush with a poor attempt of gathering her hair up in a messy bun. just to do something.

Accepting her answer and going back to their breakfast, Moon switch the glass by her mug once again, this time taking her time and letting it cool between her fingers, then bringing it to her lips once more.

"so , slept well last night?" she asked genuinely curious, took a sip of her coffee and waited

"Yeah, actually…"he cleared his throat and continued "surprisingly well" smiling and looking back at her smoothing an obedient hair already in place from his temple, a sign of nervousness….she noticed

"am sorry ..I didn't mean to sleep on you like that" he started and was he blushing?OMG

'he really didn't know how to approach this subject tooo then!' she took another sip of her coffee, enjoying the warmth of it.

"it's just, I wasn't sleeping well lately, ...as you know it already…." he trailed off looked at her with a tired smile on his face.

true, he wasn't having any shut-eye lately...she knew that better the anyone, having her room so close to Bucky's, she didn't miss every time he woke up screaming and Steve end up in his room.

they didn't talk about it, everyone knew what to do, and no one needed the reminder.

Bucky had his night terrors, Steve took care of Buck, and Moon wished every night she could do something for him...anything.

so like a silent agreement, No one spoke of it.

"am…" he started and she cut him off

"if you're gonna apologize for finally sleeping, I Will kill you!" she dared a determined look on her features and an accusing index finger to go with it!

with a smart reaction from his part, he just settled back on his chair and huffed a silent smile. human hand grabbing that accusing finger attached to that amazing girl and just …

" I will not then…" with a light squeeze of his hand.she smiled, approvingly.

He remembered the soldier .from steve's words, his mirror image in this girl's mind.

no pity or disgust, not even weakness.just pure power and admiration and unadulterated care


	9. Rain,Music and the grunting

After breakfast was finished, Bucky resumed his morning work out in the living room, which was the spacious place in the flat. before starting on papers and dossiers Natasha needed.

they came up with an arrangement, she would do the dirty work for now, and Bucky can work from where he wanted, help with the paperwork. At least until he gets better and start using his deadly skills for something more than printing profiles and finding dirt on social media,.'Red Room Investigations' was doing just fine.

 _I could see him from the bedroom's open door, all sweaty and shiny and metallic, with wet hair and all the grunt and exertion sounds that came from a red-blooded -full grown man -working out!_

 _and 'OH MY SWEET GOD WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!? Thank you to whoever is doing this to me, I will make sure to sacrifice a sheep or something at your alter!'_

 _He always trained, always, not missing a single day. sometimes working out twice when his night was pretty rough, he ended up exerting himself without thinking twice about his steve confronted him about it, worried, he said it helped with taking his mind off things, so no one said anything._

 _And let's be honest here! his fucking body would get a blind person horny!_

 _having this show every day, twice a day on occasions really keeps more than the doctor away._

 _sometimes even sleep!_

 _how many nights have I struggled to fall asleep because of Bucky working out! Or walking shirtless and doing something extremely cute like; trying to get a rebel strand of hair off his face while gathering his hair up in a bun. Muscles bulging with every move, blowing at it from the corner of his lips and looking gorgeous with the bluest cross eyes I've ever seen. Or when he would look for the remote control turning and bending over the couch and table, like a puppy trying to catch its tail. Even when he would look at Me straight in the eyes when he catches me staring at him bending into a complicated yoga pose and killing me with the brightest -knowing- smile he had in his arsenal._

 _with a sigh, fighting the memories of these past months, and my constant war with myself and my urges to just grab the fucker and kiss the nightmare out of him._

 _'Ghod! I wanted him so bad',_ with a sad frown on her face, Moon averted her eyes and turned back to her tablet... _wake up little girl!he's out of your league._

Moon put some music on to help with her work and maybe trying to overpower the porn sounds coming from the living room every once in a while. A minute later, classic rock filling the room humming along with the ageless music, she went back to her work finishing the panel before starting a new one. Singing along the song...

 _'Where have all the good men gone_ _  
_ _and where are all the gods?_

Ha! that's a very good question!

 _Where's the streetwise Hercules to fight the rising odds?_ _  
_ _Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?'_

'Not a white knight, but a dark prince just an around the corner of the room would be perfect, pretty please!'

' _Late at night I toss and I turn_ _  
_ _and I dream of what I need.'_

"UGH!" she groaned _'GhhOd! I knoww, let me forget about that for a bit please!'_

From the living room, Bucky could hear the new addition to the silence smoothed by the rain, was now replaced by Bonnie tyler's grungy vibrato,the song actually was a welcomed addition, with it's fast and jumpy music, perfect for workout!and the subtle voice or frustration grunts of Moon accompanying her .

 _'I need a hero. I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night.'_

he smiled, she was now singing in her full voice! _'was that a battle cry?'he heard a grungy "ughrr" coming from her room._

 _'He's gotta be strong_ _  
_ _and he's gotta be fast_ _  
_ _And he's gotta be fresh from the fight.'_

'I'm here baby girl!' he thought to himself, and doing a pushup number what now?

'I need a hero. I'm holding out for a hero 'til the morning light.  
He's gotta be sure  
and it's gotta be soon  
And he's gotta be larger than life!  
larger than life.'

the music did help actually, he never thought about using speakers and not earphones when he worked out with be able to fill the room with something other than loneliness and just frustration of finishing a task at hand, and just enjoying the moment even if it was just working your body till it shuts down.

he enjoyed working out, but are some days where it was just a means to an end. the end being him finally sleeping. but sometimes it's was actually fun, the days like this one, where he could play with Moon's mood and see her every reaction and every blushing moment his working out brought to life.

 _Somewhere after midnight_ _  
_ _in my wildest fantasy_

 _Somewhere just beyond my reach_ _  
_ _there's someone reaching back for me._

 _"Ghod I know, shut up!"_ he heard the frustrated words coming from her room again, was she talking to someone?"

 _Racing on the thunder and rising with the heat_ _  
_ _It's gonna take a superman to sweep me off my feet._

 _"why did I put this song again?"_ came the question for no one apparently

this made him laugh openly this time, she was talking to herself!who does that? still, he found it endearing...

no, not to was at the song, well the lyrics. Ok, so she needs a hero to sweep her off her feet is that it? duly noted! Bucky had a wicked flash in his icy eyes and a shit-eating smirk on his lips!

Moments passed, the music helps a little with the concentration and took her mind off of herself in her work accompanied only by the smooth guitar solo and Axel's voice now, with rain in the background, making it self-noticeable with every breaking thunder.

When the song ended and Nirvana's 'smells like teen spirit' started, just after the baseline Bucky urged her from the living room

"Turn it up! " he shouted.

She smiled, doing exactly that...

Then, a distanced duet was held after a second.

 _Load up on guns, bring your friends_

 _It's fun to lose and to pretend_

 _She's over-bored and self-assured_

Moon started singing like she always did, and now Bucky's voice came from the living room as passionately as hers was.

"Damn !,I love this song." he babbled just when Moon voiced

 _Oh no, I know a dirty word_

" Haha! Sorry" he ended up laughing

 _Hello, hello, hello, how low_ _  
_ _Hello, hello, hello, how low_

A metallic cling of weights being put down chimed in the living room, and the next second a breathless Bucky peeking at her door all sweaty and gorgeous, singing with the crowd dutifully.

She looked at him questioningly amused, he didn't miss a note and just like that, he turned the chair she was on facing him reaching for her hand and just pulling her up to dance with and a bit confused, she just couldn't stop blushing….fuck! he started jumping all over with the shittiest eating grin on his face. _this. see!_ gave her courage and just when for it!not even calling it dancing, it was more of an uncoordinated body movement if not something else.

 _With the lights out, it's less dangerous_ _  
_ _Here we are now, entertain us_

A confused and an unexpected laugh came out of her when he smiled that mischievous smile with an equally playful eyebrow jumps. limbs twisting and head going up and his hair even more.

 _I feel stupid and contagious_ _  
_ _Here we are now, entertain us_

He wiggled his eyebrows at the word contagious making her laugh again.  
He sure was contagious, and happy, so cute and HOT! _OhGodd! he was_ !especially right now with his free spirit and childish smile and gleaming eyes singing like there's no tomorrow.

 _A mulatto, an albino, a mosquito, my libido_

 _Oh dear god! she blushed, just don't think about the state of my libido right now_.he was looking at her  
laughing and fooling around, then in a split second,d something changed within him.

the second verse started and bucky slowed his movement,the unchoreographed mess slowing down to a quiet swaying and stuttered breathing from all that gesticulation, than the change in the atmosphere was palpable , he continued singing along the song but this time he looked like his age pounding like they run a marathon.

 _I'm worse at what I do best_

And a serious yet gentle expression morphed his features.

 _And for this gift, I feel blessed_

With a feather like a caress over her arm, starting from her forearm where he was holding her, going up to her shoulders, not missing a beat of what he meant by that.

 _Our little group, has always been_

 _And always will, until the end_

Moon went silent, mesmerised by this creature looking at her. A gentle squeeze of a right hand on a skinny shoulder, followed by a smoothing of hair behind her ear with the metallic one, always voicing what he felt with a surprisingly good voice.

Sometimes you can sing songs over and over, blasting to the music without really understanding or really grasping the meaning of the lyrics until you end up living those words. and suddenly, the whole picture comes to life and everything clicks, giving a whole new appreciation and love to the song. and it wasn't even a cheesy love song. or it can embarrass the shit out of you like the previous song did to her!

She closed her eyes at that, she understood what he meant, this song surprisingly said enough.

enough about their little family. 'our little groupe', _always will be... as imperfect as it may be,_

 _They had each other._

 _and that, until the end._

Bucky thought about her as a family, and even without doing nothing, really! help him get over his mess, but they are here for him. which was enough.

 _Even with a song clamoring in the background ,_ an unshed tear pooled in her eyes, she couldn't hold back at it to her pulsions, she lifter her arms and held him. resting her head against his chest, forehead to his him with the best way she knew.

 _And I forget just why I taste_

 _Oh yeah, I guess it makes me smile_

He was so tall compared to her, after a second of acknowledging what she did, Bucky just smiled and lowered his chin on her head, smiling even wilder after noticing how she fit his body perfectly. relieved she understood what he wanted to say...

 _I found it hard, it's hard to find_

 _Oh well, whatever, nevermind_

And just like that, either one of them minded right now...just enjoying the closeness for a while.

her fingers at the base of his neck, and his armes locked on her...no one saying anything fearing it to end.

 _I feel stupid and contagious_

They felt stupid, stupid not doing this sooner. for the first time in a while exactly like yesterday, Bucky stopped thinking about what's right and he should and shouldn't do. take a break for at least these few seconds and just stop his mind.

 _Here we are now, entertain us_

 _A mulatto, an albino, a mosquito, my libido_

 _A denial, a denial, a denial, a denial, a denial_

If anyone of them was thinking right now, they would notice that this is their first time hugging, without having Bucky's nightmares making them do anything. even though either one of them would say it outloud...

No perfect word could describe them at the moment than this one… _.A denial, a denial, a denial, a denial_.

No one even thought about moving...denying what they may think or feel about the person in their arms right now. fearing the heartbreak or was it rejection!?

If any one of them was thinking right now, A new song filled the room and only a higher power could be the instigator. 'cause the song starting, having the music list on shuffle was like giving the steering wheel to lady luck. the first notes of the song didn't go unnoticed by Moon, but it was too late to do anything about it,

 _I lose control because of you babe_

 _Oh god!_

 _I lose control when you look at me like this_

 _'Calm down ! it's just a song'_ , she blushed even more when Bucky choose that moment to look her in the eyes. with so many things in them.

 _There's something in your eyes that is saying tonight_

A quick glance to the right, more of nervousness and not knowing _where_ to look then something else…

A silent réassurance or a silent question?! neither one of them was sure.

 _I'm not a child anymore, life has opened the door_

 _To a new exciting life_

Bucky could not have chosen a better song for what he was feeling right now.

and once again, the lyrics playing with their feelings, skyrocketing their heartbeat, taking them on the scariest rollercoaster of their life. excitement and adrenaline taking them both by surprise. Which helped bucky to finally take the lead. Funny how it's a scorpion song nonetheless.

he smiled at the thought..and just going with it.

"Dance with me" he whispered , asking , pleading now, even though they were, she was already between his arms.


	10. should I be thankful or dreadful?

They were already dancing…

why did he feel the need to ask again?!

The truth was that he didn't feel the need to ask earlier, that song wasn't the kind of song needing invitation, the kind of song weighing on the soul.   


you would end up dancing anyway… 

But this song, well, just by the first notes, it was another story.

Without looking anywhere other than where she was looking right now, a silent 'yes!' answered him.  
no words needed uttering, fearing to seem too eager or anything, less pathetic maybe?..

Little that she knew, was that a few inches away from her stood an equally confused man. Eaten by his own thoughts and insecurities. 

Taking what's left of him after his nightmares wrecking the already messed up mind, and trying to glimpse at that light at the end of the line.. 

A light hand was now on the small of her back, pressing her gently to him, and cold fingers dragged on her right one, holding her in a perfect waltzing posture which was funny, cause it wasn't a waltz! But gradually loosening, morphing into What can only be described as hugging with every passing minute.   
  


I lose control when I'm close to you babe

I lose control don't look at me like this

The piercing blue eyes so soft and warm and so much more looking at her. she felt the need to look down fearing they would see right through her and read all her secrets. She blushed and tried too anyway.  
  
At that moment, remembering every eye lock, every stolen glance just trying to get a glimpse of that ice.when no was looking…  
  


There's something in your eyes, is this love at first sight

Like a flower that grows, life just wants you to know

All the secrets of life

  
  


Who knew?, maybe it was!    
  


All she knew was that Bucky Barnes was going to be the death of her…she was only a willing victim, a devoted tribute ready to be sacrificed.Or simply a woman giving herself up for this troubled soul, wanting to help and heal and.. love.

It's all written down in your lifelines

Or maybe it was destiny...wishful thinking really!…

It's written down inside your heart

The first time they met was not the beginning..  
  
It felt like she already knew him, just didn't know what he looked like, what he felt like...But now she did and it was like coming home.which made her wonder at the thought of 'destined to be together' maybe, Oh how she loved that idea.  
  


' you're such a sap! its not a movie!

Maintaining eye contact, losing themselves for a minute, engulfed in each others warmth and closeness, swaying in perfect synchronization.

letting the song voice out their thoughts.hands rediscovering long-lost territories, with every gliding of skin on skin.a tantalizing, barely -there scratching of nails on smooth sweaty surfaces. 

You and I just have a dream

To find our love a place, where we can hide away

You and I were just made

To love each other now, forever and a day

Oh, this is all she ever wanted,to love him forever and a day.  
whichever came first, really!.

There's something in your eyes that is saying tonight

I'm so curious for more just like never before

In my innocent life

Bucky didn't miss the shift in her eyes, the -so ever- quick shift of emotions when you try and do everything in your power to just keep a poker face,and hide away and just fail miserably at the end...Because this girl had the most expressive face he'd ever encountered, well, when she wasn't playing the 'staring game' anyway.  
  


what was she thinking? he thought, the words coming from the speakers was literally voicing out what he was thinking.

he wanted more, but did not have the guts to say it!

well, not yet at least!

Time stands still when the days of innocence

Are falling for the night

He was falling, he could feel himself falling. and 'Dear god that was scary!.'..

and like always, the lyrics said what he couldn't, No! what he was omitting. 

just out loud.

I love you girl I always will

I swear I'm there for you

Till the day I die.

At the last sentence, Bucky just embraced her, bringing his metallic hand resting over hers on his heart.   
let her feel his heart beating, resting his chin on her head, once more swaying to the soft guitar.

she accepted him in her life, she welcomed him in her home without asking nothing in return. she didn't say anything about his screams at night, or his temper sometimes when he closed himself up and just went through it...,   


  
Always making sure he ate regularly even when he didn't go out of his room when it was hard to just be outside. he would hear her approaching his bedroom door with her high heels and letting a trail filled with fruits and some sandwiches, making sure he had everything he needed.and then she would go to work.

  
Or when he woke up screaming and Steve would come barging into his room, he knew she was up too, lingering in the shadows at his bedroom door waiting, and giving him privacy.  
  


He wanted to thank her in so many ways, but he knew, just knew she wouldn't want anything in return, she was one of those souls put on earth to give joy in helping the lost ones…and sure as hell, he was one of the lost souls.

She would want anything to do with him. He was so sure about that,yet….

If She knew that he wanted her practically every second that they're together these days, in ways that Bucky knows neither one of them are even ready for yet,   
  


Bucky would lose her. There's not a doubt in his mind. He knew he would be a handful, and a burden if he took that step, and he can not let it happen..but, 

was it really?!or were those thoughts just his mind and insecurities messing with his happiness and fear of change?.

  
Who would want something broken in the first place?

And yet, he screws up anyways, because he was only human, because he's got this stupid and screwed up things in his head that messes up every decent relationship  with the opposite sex, and because She's standing here between his arms, with one arm around his back.looking as delicious as she smelled right now, always that chocolaty fragrance enveloping her, and … 

She makes the mistake of chuckling nervously at the song coming out of the speakers now and picks that moment to tip her head towards Bucky and look up at him with those big, brown eyes under the huge black-rimmed glasses .blushing even more.

Because for one stupid moment, Bucky sees that look, that smile – and it feels so good,a freaking teenager all over again,and that, that's something new and very welcomed.  
  


His chest is tight, for something other then terror for once.and his eyes have a tiniest glaze to them, and so does hers. her pupils are Blown right now, mirroring his.  
The silly song already blasting in the background and Bucky's already forgotten what it was, because the next thing he knows, he's leaning down, for Moon's still slightly curled lips.In a split second, the whole world stops...its so close, just a little further and you can taste her…

"Moonnn!" a timid voice filled the apartment, they froze like deer in a headlight!!

" I let myself in, where are you gurl?"

"shit" 

well, this pretty much brought them to their senses alright!

"Amel's here!!!! what time is it?" she asked baffled

"its..its like eleven fifteen," answered Bucky, already looking like a lost puppy, blushing at what he was about to do.

damn t! that was close!

"Moon" another shout

"in my room!" she replied, " I'll be out in a minute" 

" I ..I should,..I should ..go take a shower..." started Buck even though his arms were still on her body.

Oh God!

"Yeah, Ok. cool"  for nothing better to do at the moment, to try and keep an semblance of normalcy and chill. "shower is good!" 'stop talking now!' "amma go..see. alright!"

'don't think about him in the shower, don't think about him in the shower!"

with a litany of shit...shitt...shitt  in her head, she detached herself from him feeling as if she was sentenced to the guillotine.  
she fidgeted with her clothes and rearranging hair already in place.

Oh! they were both idjits alright!

Bucky split out to his room on the left just as Amel popped her head at the end of the corridor.

"Hey dude, I could hear the blasting music from outside! knew you wouldn't hear me,so used the key you kept under the fire extinguisher."she continued shedding her black trench coat.

"how is it hanging?" came the familiar words accompanied with a warm smile

A petite figure ,with shoulder short wavy hair brunette and beautiful brown eyes was hugging her warmly, dressed in a casual yet smart everyday outfit, a dark blue Italian cut blazer on her  light grey turtleneck shirt, with white skinny jeans and a pair of black low boots, matching her black leathery huge bag, from where she was taking a large pile of papers!

"Oh My God you are a lifesaver!" Moon sighted " I completely forgot about the latest changes in the approved script! !!" 

"yep, that's me! your knight in skinny jeans!" 

"sorry for making you come all the way here!"said Moon as she took the file to sit on her chair, "I didn't know I didnt have a copy" Already checking the changes made on her texts

.

" yeah, bad luck with the power down at the office, I could have emailed it to you!"Amel started,"making herself comfortable on Moon's bed!

"yeah, about that! what happened ?"

"beyond me, they say it's 'cause of this heavy raining thing...some sort of water leaking or something, so to prevent further complications they shut down the whole floor for like two days!"

"ha!lucky I stayed home then!"

"sure are!"Amel took on studying 'the Room', something was off about Moon and she could smell it,

" all the artists are all working from home,!"

she took a look at her girl going through her work.her face was bright red, when she came up, and did her best to avoid the eye contact, which was so not her style, 

the girl she knew could make you blush while speaking with her intense eye-lock during a conversation!

And the thing is, she's been on the same page for more than five minutes, weird, it was a panel script, no more then few lines, space on the page she was reading...

no something was up!

" what's up with you"asked Amel, approaching her friend, "are you sick or something?you're all flushed!"

"oh, yeah, nO  nothing, its just hot in here that's all."

"humm huh! , where is Steve anyhow! I haven't seen that pretty face since the last office party!"Oh, Steve....

"dude, its a weekday, he's at work!"

"Bummer!I wanted to say Hi!" she replied wiggling her eyebrows!

"sure you did!"moon laughed!

they started heading out after a while, Amel first followed by Moon.at that moment, the chime of a microwave ding made itself noticed! and that's when Moon began to panic!

she actually forgot about him being here for a second there! just as they were about to reach the end of the corridor opening on the center space of the apartment where Bucky was sweating merely minutes ago, the thought made Moon blush once again! damn…

"oh mama! who's tha honk on the couch reading the comic?" asked Amel with a genuine surprise look on her face

"oh,that's just Bucky, steve's Best..., wait, h..he's doing what?" she blurted out

"reading cap's comic book" answered Amel,

"Omg "reaching for her friend's shoulder to see for herself, hidden from his eyes behind the wall.she couldn't believe her eyes!

"what? " asked the girl,not getting the gist of it!

and he was there, sitting on the couch, hair in a bun freshly showered.on the table close to his reach, a bunch of comics.

"omg..omg... he's reading it, hes reading it what will I dooo omgggg"  
  


"calm down moon, what's the big deal"

' what's the big deaaall? Its the fucking winter soldier comic, he's reading about himself, the actual fantasy version of my twisted mind that's what!'

"you don't get it ! its the winter...you know what!, never mind..." she trailed off

"ok!" came the reply as she headed out for the couch.

Noticing the girls coming in, he closed the pages and got up! a warm smile on his face.

ugh! always the charmer!

"hey there pretty ladies," said Bucky with his usual charms; " wanna have some lunch?"

"hey, am Amel  I work with Moon"she offered her hand for a handshake

"nice to meet you Amel, Am Bucky"

"so you're the other one!,!" with that, she gave a quick but a proud look to Moon  mouthing 'NICE!' and an all-knowing smiled reigned on her face,   


"I'll talk to you soon Gurl, keep me in the loop!" she started heading to the door putting her coat on.

"k!" came the -kill me on the spot-reply

"don't you wanna join us for lunch?" asked bucky the charming host again!

"nah, am needed elsewhere! raincheck?" turning to answer but already reaching for the doorknob

"sure thing!" 

"see ya dudes!"she blurted out opening the door, Both Bucky and moon replied

"see ya!"  said bucky amused and Moon already thinking about her life choices!

with a subtle wink and a cheeky smirk, she was out, leaving them looking at each other uncomfortably.

a heavy silence crashed on them and that was awkward! the event of the last time they were next to each other they were about to kiss!

"soo, hungry?" attempted Bucky

"sure, in just a minute?"

"i'll be here!!"he added smiling warmly ,starting heading to her room

...............................

'fuck fuck fuck fuckkkk!!'oh god!

did that just happen or am I dreaming! he was about to kiss me! Me! 

OMG, and HE IS READING THE COMIC? REALLY!'

Crashing onto my bed face down wishing it was the earth actually opening up and taking me in!  and flying in outer space at the same time! 

yeah, that much!

I can't lie anyone .its written all over my face.steve knows it, sure as hell even  'He' even knows it. and no way in hell Amel didn't catch on it by now! turning down food, I mean seriously!?  
Ughrr!! KILL MEEEE!

I want him,I want Bucky, I want him so fucking badly that its downright painful just to see him so close, every day and not being able to touch him, or drag my fingers through his hair, or even just be close to him in ways I know myself capable of. 

and yet I WAS SO CLOSE JUST MINUTES AGO! whyyyyyy!!!

And It was soo about to happen if it wasn't for the interruption!,my minds latest hobby these days was to torture me with endless erotic dreams of Bucky spread all over my bed.whimpering with the sweetest pleasures and shivering with every delicious thing I ought to provide If wishes could come true.

and he was so close, really close! But was it a good thing that it actually didn't happen?; I mean,it would hurt me more to lose him than to never have had him at all.  
at least this way,i don' know what am missing out on if I actually fully Had him ....

Uughrrrr! it's just in your damn head, wake up!

But then he comes and does stuff like that, what did he think? did he really wanted me or was he just acting on his impulses?

sex and love sure as hell were the same for Men! 

And if he did want just sex, would I be willing to go there?

it never was for me, those two words were the two sides of the same coin!   
so would I be able to do it if he only wanted one thing?!

God! that's what happens when you overthink everything even things that are only in your head.'NOTHING HAPPENED YOU DRAMA QUEEN!"

Unless I knew some higher power to help with my request,so sticking to the dream world is the best thing!

Ok, try picturing this, having the most epic wet dream about someone, and then you wake up; and he is just there! the perfect reminder of what isn't yours!  and ending up literally having the object of your desire sitting perfectly beautiful just inches from you , and still can't have it, or touch. cause he can never belong to you .

its kind of sad I know, and twisted in a way too.

Dreaming was something...but now it was within reach, I mean he really tried to kiss me, felt it and nearly tasted it. I was sitting on my bed, my shirt still smelling of him from his sweaty chest on mine.

I can no longer turn a blind eye..am so head over heels for this boy. and I can not go back to the pining and silently drooling over him...damn it! am a full grown woman for god's sakes! I need to do something about it.

I mean, where is the harm in that, what's the worst that can happen? Just reach, pluck and eat! 

come on woman, grow a pair! 

A shadow of a decision took home in my mind, and with it, my resolve to just go for it! starting by getting my ass off the bed, and go have that fucking lunch.


	11. Draw me like one of your French girls!

A few hours passed, which neither one of them noticed until Steve came home at the end of the day.

"Stevie is that you? Great!" Came her relieved call as she ran out to meet him halfway, too excited to wait for the reply.

"Who else would live with your messy ass!?!" came the replay, nodding a silent 'hey man!' to Bucky sitting on the couch.

"Oh shut it, Blondie", she snorted at him, "I need you to do the thing for me again tonight!"

'The thing! What thing?', Bucky thought. That piqued his interest.

"Ugh! Give me ten minute to freshen up and I'll be all yours." Came Steve's reply, slightly annoyed yet not dismissing the idea. It was understandable, he had just come home.

"God I love you." She beamed at him, practically jumping to grab his face with both hands and kissing him on each cheek with a noisy smack.

"I know, stop PDAing already!" Again annoyed, though not unopposed still. With a satisfied giggle she went back to her room, but not before pushing up the black rimmed glasses she had on with her index finger and winking at Bucky, who witnessed the whole thing from the couch.

"But wait, I brought dinner. Get your ass back here before it gets cold!" He shouted after her after. She stopped, remembering what were in those bags he was still holding were for.

"That is very true, I'm starving," she came back as fast as she'd gone just seconds ago, glasses now holding the stray hairs at her hair line. "Ok, dinner, then the thing." she stated.

"Ugh! You tyrant!" He rolled his eyes and headed for the kitchen.

Bucky was still lost on what exactly was going on just in front of his eyes, yet he didn't feel he should ask even though curiosity was eating at him. The thing. What the hell was the thing? There never was a mention of a 'thing' before, she looked frustrated and slightly pissed but for what!?And seeing steve was like the answer to her current problem.

"Slow your horses Quicksilver, or you're gonna choke!" Steve said after they got seated and started going through what steve brought, chinese food and an apple pie tucked safe in the fridge for later.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled over the mouthful of spicy noodles. Both him and bucky kept looking at her, Buck sure hadn't seen this side of her before, she looked like a kid too excited to go play with a new toy, who couldn't stay still for a minute, which was a completely three sixty from the person he almost kissed none other than this morning.

"What's the thing?" Bucky asked looking at both of them suspiciously, searching for answers.

"Wouldn't you like to know!" Came her sassy reply, eyes squinting and eyebrows wiggling at him. Steve snorted a laugh, and just played dumb.

"Sorry Serge, but this is a level six. I don't think you have clearance yet." Came the reply with that familiar wickedness in her voice, tipping her fingers together in the same way a master plotter posed dramatically sometimes in movies. Head slowly nodding knowingly and eyes still squinting for the whole dramatics. The only thing missing was the devilish 'BouAhahahahah' which made steve laugh even harder causing him to practically have his noodles coming out through his nostrils.

'Something must have happened between them, she is more playful than usual with him.' Steve thought. 'Interesting.'

"Uh huh." bucky replied slightly annoyed, to be honest, returning the squinty eyes to her; but still it made him smile and he looked more open.

'Something definitely happened while I was out!'

The good thing about take outs was that there were not dishes to do, just grab the cartons and introduce them to the trash can. Heaven, to say the least.

"Alright, bring your ass as soon as you can, I'm kind of dying here!" she said already walking to her room.

"Ok, what should I wear; the usual?!" He asked.

"Yep! Thanks stevie." Came the reply from the corridor.

Bucky was still lost, but now he was lost sitting back on the couch resuming what he was doing earlier.

After short while - more like five minutes - Steve was heading to Moon's room in what could only be described as dark blue yoga pants, and a tight white T shirt. After a short silent minute Bucky could make out something.

"Ok, how do you want me?" Bucky heard steve ask.

What the...

"Yes. Oh mama; that's what I'm talking about." A feminine voice reached his ears. "Lose the shirt hot shot, I need the front."

"Okay", came his voice again,"where did you put it?"

"In my closet, at the bottom." Came her reply. "Alright, let's do this!" A determined clap of hands filled the room and then silence.

'What the hell is happening?'

"It's not working..." Bucky could make out some of what was happening. "Try this position, bend the knees...and hold it like that!"

'What.'

"...and try to arch your back,-"

"Like that!?"

'The.'

"Ooooh, perfect!"

"Ok, i can see what you mean!"

'Hell.'

"Hold still for a minute, can you?"

"Sure thing, just don't focus on one thing and forget the rest, Moon, ok?"

'Is.'

"Oooh, just like that!"

"Awesome! That's ma boi!"

'Happening?'

"What the-?" Bucky blurted out.

He went back to the spot he occupied earlier, curiosity eating at him with renewed vigor. He resumed his work, but kept his attention towards what might be happening in the first room in the corridor, close to where he was sitting. He could hear some amused giggles coming after a while, with instructions and suggestions and suddenly a muffled bang followed by a chricking feminine laugh and a pained masculin moan was the drop that flooded the glass. Bucky got on his legs and headed to the room, where the hysterical laughter was still going, at the door, he caught Steve getting up and a hand at the small of his back rubbing and trying to sooth the pain.

"Holly shit that hurts!" Steve admitted.

"Ha! I bet it did," came Moon's reply, "that was stupid of you. You know you're not really Cap,

Steve, what got into you trying to do it yourself?" she added whilst helping him sit on the bed.

"Yeah, yeah, still, you asked for it." answered Steve, neither one of them had noticed Bucky at the door witnessing everything.

"What the hell happened?" asked Bucky making them both turn to see him.

Steve was shirtless sitting at the edge of her bed, and Moon was...dressed! of course she'll be dressed, what did you expect to find them doing?! stupid moron! and is that cap's shield?

"Hey Buck,"

"Stevie here though he could pull out an acrobatic stance I needed to draw for Cap and ended up meeting the floor face first!" Moon explained ,two brown eyes hidden underneath black rimmed glasses looked at him with so much mischief " Oh you should had seen It Buck, it was Hilarious!"

She jested clearly still having fun despite her friend's demise.

" Uh hun, shut up!"Steve sputtered at her with no visible anger at the moment."I repeat, YOU ASKED FOR IT " Displaying is puppy dog eyes ,he looked more adorable than angry to be honest.

"I sure did, but didn't mean for you to actually do the full thing, I just wanted you to pose and YOU were the one who wanted to try the whole thing for real! "She revealed smugly, arms crossed clearly worried .

A huffed laugh came from the door making them both look at Bucky questioningly.Then that silent sound turned into a full on burst of laughter ,with eyes closing and hands grabbing his knees ,fully bend with uncontrolled amusement.

"So that's..what you were up too!-" Bucky acknowledged between sets of getting air to his lungs

"Posing and drawing! that's the thing?" He actually finished with a smooth swiping of a tear from his left eye.

"Well, yeah!" Said moon, "What did you expect?" Kneeling to lift Captain America's shield laying at his feet.

A shirtless ,yoga pants clade blondi and a hot mess of a brunette in the same room, with weird instructions about bending and spreading and weird noises as the cherry on top could in fact lead you to a very different expectations.

"Nothing..nothing, it's stupid anyways!" He snorted.Dismissing everything with his bionic hand.

"Alright, alright," Moon started again looking at Steve,"Can you do the bending again, or do you wanna stop?" She asked taking her glasses of over her head.

"I don't know, it's still sting but,did you get what you wanted? " Asked Steve hopefully.

"To be honest, I only got like half of it, but it's Ok. I will see what I can do with what I have."She inquired, a flair of disappointment on her features for a split second,which wasn't lost on Bucky.

He wondered when did he become so tuned to her feelings and Moods?

"Or," Started Bucky which made them both turn to him once again.intrigued both and waiting for him to finish what he wanted to say.

" I can do it" he volunteered and took a step into the room,"I mean, if you still have to finish!".

A surprised look on Moon and an approving one on Steve.

'Oh this could be fun!' thought steve.

" You would?" asked Moon clearly didn't expect this outcome and clearly blushing slightly.

"Yeah, I mean it can't be that hard! "He went to the desk to check the drawing.

"you already Know I'm pretty flexible" He added looking straight at her with a knowing smugg,

One perfect eyebrow going up.And that filthy one sided smirk, the trademark of Bucky Barnes.

'That's my boi!' Thought Stevie ,really enjoying where everything was heading.

The double meaning hidden in his words was not lost on Steve,who amusedly beamed at his best friend. A wiggle of both his eyebrows hidden from Moon's eyes..

She knew he was, if not for the hours spent drooling over him whilst he did his yoga.

She wasn't an idiot she knew he could spread -twist-bend-or literally do the acrobatic she needed without breaking a sweat.And that, well,she sure as hell was looking forward to.

"And, me and stevie already have practically the same build , so it wouldn't be much of a difference to draw wouldn't it?"He admitted.

"Yeah, Ok!" She started slightly baffled; " I'd love that, thanks Bucky" She finished with a warm smile.

"Alright!-" Bucky started with an excited clap" How do you want me?" He asked smiling

Ohh barnes, where would I start?!

"Aaand that's my cue!" Said Steve and got up to leave the room .Lifting the shield next to him and offering it to Bucky.The action was not lost on Moon ,it made her literally bounce with joy at the sight of the exchange.

With a last look at Moon ,full of support and what can only be described as pride of a work well done. Steve left the room with a wink.

"Have fun kids,and don't do anything stupide!"

"How could we, you're taking all the stupide with you!" Came Bucky's fast reply directly taken from the comics . And That, see that made her practically weep with joy!!.

Bucky looked at her with a complicit smile ,knowing she would get the reference.

Understanding that now, she started wondering If steve didn't do it on purpose this time.

'Oh those two idjits, they're gonna be the death of her!'

"Take your shirt off " She disclosed close to a whisper,blushing after his spreading smile .

"Whatt!? At least buy me dinner first," He jested hiding himself behind the shield "I'm an old fashion guy doll." He added batting his eyelashes at her like a blushing dame!

"Ohhh!! I would never!!" She played snobbishly shocked.Eyes dramatically widening , hand on her chest like those high class snobs for the full dramatics which made him laugh open heartedly

same sense of humor, nice!he knew he liked her for something!

" I kind of having troubles with the chest and abdominal muscle, detailing the whole body movement with the acrobatic stunts"She added seriously now.

"I can do that."He started undressing with both hands reaching behind his neck and grabbing the collar of the sweatshirt ,and the toptank he had on and passing the materials over his head. With a swift move finishing on the floor.

" Is this Ok?, or should I go get my yoga pants?" He added with smugness pretty sure was illegal.

"Oh, no no, it's fine" She gasped blushing even more,visibly thinking it over in her head!

Bucky was now shirtless, pants hanging so low .He straightened up again, back standing straight,one hand in his back pockets and the metal one holding the shield like it was made for him.

Hair disheveled with the static of the act ending up messing his bun and loosening some strands all over his face,looking all so fucking deliciously just out of bed, and damn if that wasn't a good picture.

Because she was closer to him,it seemed that she didn't have control over her limbs ,because they were slowly going for the elastic holding his tresses, and finally let it all fall, darkening ,

falling like silky curtains on either sides of his face .Following the gravity, leading her eyes to his shoulders,it was the first time that she actually could see the whole scar on his left shoulder.The first time that it was completely visible to the world and it was mesmerising.She felt the need to touch the pink skin and feel it under her fingertips ,it must be so soft...

He kept looking at her, her eyes checking every strand of hair on either side till it was exactly like she wanted it .Arranging it with her soft fingers to her satisfaction,eyes jumping from one side to the other.

He was pretty sure cap didn't have long hair,yet he said noting .Just enjoyed her boldness regarding him,she must feel more at ease now being with him ,or she wouldn't have dared .And that, surely made him feel warm inside.He felt slightly shy about the visible scar but, she seems unmoving so he chose not the linger on it.

And there he was, the Winter fucking Soldier ,shirtless with his metal hand holding the shield like it was meant to be! And oh dear heavens and all the angels,she could actually weep right now!

She took her time and kept her eyes all over him,completely forgetting about him actually seeing her devouring him with her love sick puppy eyes .Slowly backing off to her desk to get the whole picture.

He expected it,he was posing for her.But the look she had on now had nothing to do with studying the human body, it was more close to trying to decide which part to start eating first . and that honest to god made him shiver.'Oh this girl had more passion hidden underneath that sweet girl act, that made him want to coax it out of her with everything he gathered along the years.'

It was when she hit the chair behind her with the back off her knees that she finally caught herself staring.She cleared her throat and resumed sitting,fidgeting with the sketches and the pancils trying to get a hold on her feelings right now.and he was NOT helping either!

"Draw me like one of your french girl."He whispered huskily, voice so very low and seductive , clearly amused by her futile attempt of having control over her emotions. And he could have fun too you know!

She just chuckled without looking at him."Alright Rose, chill !" "get your shit together!'

the still so fresh memorie of the last time they were both in this room ,looming all over the place didn't help to say the least.

He did try to kiss her! Like for real. And he was the one initiating it!! She was just too surprised to act on it,and certainly not against it!

He witnessed everything, the litany of emotions written on her face. The way her heart was beating ,her hair held in a high bun helped to confirm it. It's easy enough to know,with the way the carotid artery was pumping on her neck was any proof of that.

He can have fun.He wanted to have fun!

"So," He started to get her out of her thoughts" How do you want me?" He asked again

approaching her chair .He was getting closer and closer by the second and she didn't have the strength to not be alarmed by his every move!

'Oh Dear God!give me the fucking nerve to get through this alive!'

"I..I want this." She started,showing him a half sketched jump ,not very detailed yet,but he could understand the gist of it.

"So Cap was jumping backwards from a very high building ; head first.Then twisting in mid air to land on one knee and the shield ."She explained

"Alright, so no shield in this one! I can do that!" He replied already taking position across from her.Puting the shield back on her bed "We will do the landing pause after"

"So you need the bending back thing first , I think this pose can help with that! "

He slid down to the floor and ,and knelt. Brought both his arms in front of him ,elbose and front armes flat on the floor and in a second he was upside down. Contorted himself into almost a backbending position in a flash, legs standing straight.

The-standing on his arms- thing was a pretty basic thing to do, she still remembers when she did it, but still fascinating to witness when this beautiful creature did it so easily just inches away from her .

Holding still for a minute taking his equilibrium , then he started slightly bending backward .legs slowly lowering to that perfect arch.

she couldn't stop staring, he was mesmerising,truly powerful and so damn sexy! Oh the fucking torture she's gonna be on from now on!

The soft loose hair,the bronzed skin glowing in the yellowish light coming from the bedside lamps tanning his skin with gold.The smooth line between those well defined and firm pectorals muscles, the subtil curve between every abdominal bulge of his six pack,and that sweet smooth and sensual slide of his happy trail on either sides of his stomach all the way down to where they were supposed to meet , A trail cut short by the fabric of his pants hanging so low it pretty much spoiled the imagination.

"Perfect!" She breathed!

He just smiled fondly and proudly , closing his eyes to concentrate.

"Can't hold it for long ,doll" He confessed

"Yeah, right, shit, I'm sorry, I'll start now"She bubbled fidgeting with her glasses and grabbing the pencil and the sketch pad.

She sketched furiously.Back in art school, she'd taken a figure drawing class, and for the first few minutes of class they warmed up by drawing these "gestures," trying to capture the pose in ten to fifteen seconds.

Bucky managed to hold the backbend for a good minute and some changes ,and that was so enough for her to scrib what she needed , adding to the rugh pencil lines on her papers from what stevie contributed firstly.

" Ughr ! Need a break," Grunting, and lowering down to his back, flat on her carpeted floor,noticeably breathing faster.

"I think I got it," She said.

"You sure? If you give me a minute, I can do it again."

"Let me see." Moon set her sketchbook down and transferred over to the panel. In a few minutes she had it. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Bucky get up and wander about in her room, gently massaging his left shoulder ,it must have been a bit uncomfortable to have that pressure on his shoulder for that long.

Attention back to the shield ,giving her space to finish her last touches without having someone at her back.She smiled fondly ,relieved.He knew without saying anything , and gave her space to finish working without having someone over your shoulders.

After a minute or so he made himself comfortable on her bed, arms spread up on either side of his sprawled hair , completely at ease.

She took her time and finished inking , but after awhile she started smiling at something,clearly lost in her head.He noticed it because of a silent huffing sounding like holding a laugh in.

"What's funny?" He asked tilting his head to look at her,and crossed his arms under his head

" I was just thinking that, the Winter Soldier actually posed as Captain America" She answered with a honest smile looking all hopeful and proud.'and Cap himself gave him the shield.'

"What's funny about it"

"Nothing, if you don't know about the crazy fan theories on the internet." She explained " In the story I vaguely points that Cap will pass the shield on to someone else;and the winter soldier is on of them"

"I see, and you thought about if any of the fans actually saw me posing at Cap would make their day didn't you?"

"Oh , you know me so well!" She beamed at him and returned back to her work.

"About that," He started again, sitting up on the edge of the bed " I liked it, I really Liked it"

"You did?"She turned to face him once again this time face completely open. The panel forgotten;she was so scared of his replay.

"I liked the antics between the soldier and the falcon, its funny" He added smiling

" The old and the new best friend war .Yeah it's my favorite too, so you've reached 'Civil war' then awesome" She beamed with mirth;after a moment he added

"It's scary how you could build all that from just stories stevie told you.The way you could imagine the war part and the ..t-torture " He stopped

She didn't say anything , took off her glasses and held them on her lap.

"It was so vivid, and ..and familiar"He finished looking at something lost in different time certainly.

" I did a lot of research about the war and stuff,I just used it .But.." She trailed off

"James;"she got up walked towards him and knelt between his legs, cold hand from holding the pencil grab his warm flesh one.Making him look at her.

"Steve didn't say anything to me,he only said that you were held captive for a while and that you came back after.I actually have no Idea about what happens to you.all that story line about the origin of the Soldier was imagination, and yet," She trailed of once again, "I shouldn't have,I'm so sorry! I didn't even ask your permission for that,I'm sorry" She stopped talking trying to find the next words

He smiled at her all blushing and regretful , yet, he wasn't against it, he made sure to tell her

"You're right,you shouldn't have!" He whispered,"But am happy you did" He brought up his metal hand to her face, and added" I'm glad about how you turned it up, how you took that horror and made something good out of it.It wasn't that glamourous, but still...I'll tell you about it one day"

A baffled look was in front of him,she didn't believe he just said that

"The James Buchanan Barnes in your stories is more than I hoped to be in real life"He whispered to her or to himself, she didn't know.

"You are!" She breathed out" God, you are, why can't you see it?"

Big brown eyes watering for him.He didn't deserve those tears. Yet, they warmed his heart.He wished he could cry too,maybe fallen silent tears would lift a bit of what's in his heart.

He smiled , his metal fingers ventures in her hair ,holding the back of her neck fermely, and slowly sealed a kiss on her forehead,lingering close for a second or two.

"As long as You can see it , it's enough for me."He confessed voice so low it was barely a whisper,leaning his forehead on hers.

"Now,do you need me to pose for you some more?"

The attempt of changing the subject was obvious to her, so she played along.

"Nah, I Need a break," Swift fingers erasing fallen tears as soon as she said the words,she started going up even though all the muscles in her body screamed at her to just wrap him in a warm blanket and hold him, keep him under her protection safe from the world." I've been at it all day,I'll finish tomorrow."

"Alright, let me know if you need me" He added grabbing his scaterd shirts on the floor, and putting them back on

She kept looking at him dressing backup and that hurt even more.he noticed her

"Ha, you perve!" He jested smiling knowingly at her,trying to keep her out of her thoughts.

" M' not!"

"Are too" He replied, "It's understandable, I mean, have you seen me?" He gestured to his incredible built smuggly smirking

where was that lost puppy minutes ago?

"Oh My god Barnes you did not just go there!"

" Uhm humm" he finished and headed for the door, but didn't cross it until he winked back at her with a gentle smile.

"You want some tea,am having some tea!" He added from the corridor,clearly an invitation to join him.He didn't have any desire of being alone right now.

" Sure, I'll have some tea, "She joined him "But don't go telling,I have a reputation to uphold!"Already out of the room and heading to the kitchen.

"Yeah yeah, the 'Drinking Only Coffee Society' will never hear anything from me I promise!"

He made a cross over his heart then reached for the angry ninja and the deadliest cups with one hand, and the tea pack with the other while she put the kettle on .Working smoothly together in the small space, dancing around each other.Checking the clock on the kitchen wall,it was still early evening.Then he opened the fridge,and literally 'oohed!'

"IOuuh piiiie!!" He bubbled taking it off and putting it on the counter, that sound slightly familiar to Moon's ears."Thank you Stevie!"

" Wanna watch something on TV?" Asked Moon

" Nothing in particular,what do you suggest?" Asked Bucky

"I need my dose" She explained with a dreamy look .The way he 'ou-ed' made her think about Dean.

"What,.?" The kettle started whistling in the background , Bucky got it fast while she cut too slices of Dean's true love after Baby of course' and headed for the couch.

"The new episodes aren't out yet, but i'm still feeling nostalgic" she started" And pie, always makes me miss my baby!" She added ,putting more space on the small table with bucky's paper and arranging the comics and grabbing the remot control.

" Nostalgic about what" He asked coming to her with two hot mugs of lemons and honey tea with real slices of lemon in each mug with one hand. 'Oh he was a dear!'

and grabbing both servings of pie with the other and following her to the couch.

"Supernatural , the Tv show"she cleared out

"It's still on?" He seated himself next to her" How many seasons are there now?" He asked genuinely curious " I think I left it at the second or the third, I don't remember very well"

" Oh honey, add another ten seasons to that!" she braged

"Thirteen?" He marveled .Damn, he really was behind!

" Actually it's fourteen, and still going strong baby!" She replied clearly proud

" I can't imagine how it's gonna be when the show actually ends! " She whispered,"It hurts just thinking about it!"

"Alright fangirl ,I get it!" He chucked

She beamed at him through her glasses like love sick puppy and took her mug with both hands enjoying the warmth between her fingers! she sure loved her boys!

She asked him if he wanted to start the show from the beginning,and he said he wasn't planning on it but still enjoyed whichever episode she put on .So she selected a random season on the list and made herself comfortable on the couch next to him.

He really didn't mind ,he didn't have a preference over what to watch, the Winchesters made her happy, and he wouldn't be against some company rightnow.

When she settled back and leaned comfortably on the couch, taking a sip of hot tea,barnes reminded her with a whisper.

"Be careful,don't burn those lips of your again" He looked at her warmly, eyes darting back and forth between her lips and her eyes. she was so close to him!.

She replied with smile tilting her head slightly, those said lips smirking at him warmly.

'And suddenly the kansas song blasted from the speakers and so did Moon ,singing along excitedly wiggling her eyebrow at him unapologetic at all.

Accepting his luck ,he just set back and relaxed .Even more when she took the warm small blanket they kept on the couch and covered them both ,then resumed drinking and visibly shivering ever so slightly whenever the engine of the car 'baby' rored …

"Damn, I love that car!"she sighed right on cue!

"You're biased!"

" Don't need to, its a freaking beauty!"

"Sure is!" he agreed taking a bit.

Two episodes later, Steve joined them.Looking all pink and freshly showered.it clearly was a bath he took.He looked more relax now.

"Are you watching what I think you're watching?" Asked steve

Moon beamed at him from the couch and Bucky made the -I know man!- face.

"Which season?"

" I think it's the 'Dick stop!' season" She replied knowing he would get the reference.aAfter all, he lived with her longer.

"Oh I love the dick jokes on that one!" Added Steve, grabbing his share of pie and sitting on the other end of the big couch making Moon sitting in the middle.

So that's why she was giggling throughout the show.thought Bucky.the innuendos are subtle but again the main Bad guy asked people to call him Dick! so...

"The writers of the show are a gift to mankind!" She added finishing his thoughts.

" Why do you love the show again?" aske Buck

"ha!,let's see..." She started " life, death, sacrifice and redemption,love and lose,... I can go all day!" She said with a warm look,thinking for a bit.

"But mainely cause the girls are Badasses, and the Boys are HOT!"She finished with a mouthful of pie and a proud smile looking at Bucky.

"Faire enough!" he replied accepting her replay

The rain kept pouring throughout the evening and the majority of the night.

tea drank and pie finished. Episode after episode, they lost themselves and the track of time.

After a while, Steve excused himself and went to bed, not everyone worked from home.which left them alone once again.And with every passing moment, they got closer and closer on the couch,both of them slightly shifting towards each other smoothly.seeking warmth.

After a while, Moon let her hair down ,rubbing the her scalp in pure comtempt.glasses off, she literally curled herself under the blanket next to Bucky ,clearly not planning on going anywhere. head resting on the back next to his;she was closer and he could smell her clearly now with her hair dawn,it was so soothing.

The Winchesters where investigating a psychic town now, where everyone in this town seemed to have some kind of power to look over the veil. Thinking it was a vengeful spirit,they were talking to what looked like a butler, asking questions about two sisters that lived together in the early nineteen hundred.whose pictures were on the wall.

"Who are they?" asked Sam

" The Fox sisters.Kate Fox was apparently quite troubled, but mesmerising on stage" Counted the Butler

"That's her" Confirmed Dean looking at his brother

"Her older sister Margaret perhaps not a natural psychic but .."The butler continued

"Full of crap!" Cut him Dean.

Yes, well..but she looked after her sister, sometimes One's true gift is taking care of others…" finished the butler,looking at the pictures.

" See how sometimes the cases they are on relate to the boys? Dean is the caretaker like Margaret no particular gifts 'well that's how he thinks',and sam is the golden boy ,it's subtle,but makes you go owwh!" she smiled melting for the boys!

"I love it when the writers do that!" she commented.

Now Dean and Sam were more interested in where the sisters were buried in the background But Bucky's mind was stuck on what the Butler just said.

"sometimes One's true gift is taking care of others…"

He looked at her lost in the episode even thought she already knew the outcome.still fangirling over the boys and making weird noises ,or commenting over things now and then, clueless about what he was thinking.

She didn't know that he thought exactly the same about her.Sometimes your lucky enough in life to find someone with that special and rare gift.Maybe that's why it was so natural to live with this stranger from Steve's stories.

Somehow,she completely made herself a full member in Bucky's life,making the years in when he didn't know her missing something.Looking at her now smiling warmly ,clearly lost in his head,Bucky felt grateful for the first time in a while.

-"What?" she asked after she caught him lost looking at her.

-"Nothing," he whispered. "Just...thank you for being part of my life!"

Out of nowhere,taking her warm hand with his metal one, bestowing a feather light brushing of lips on the top.Making her lose the ability of pletely baffled and blushing fifty shades of red as usual.

Then she chose to answer by getting closer to him ,resting her head right on his scared shoulder nuzzling the crock of his neck,filling her scenes with menthy shampoo and warm shirt sleeved metal prosthetics.

No words could discribe how she felt.and she didn't need


End file.
